Transportation: Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing...

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 890

You deserved it 3 408

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 881

You deserved it 3 719

By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 04:53 - United States

Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 101

You deserved it 2 553

Three's a crowd

By Anonymous - 13/08/2014 11:33 - Australia - Rooty Hill

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 668

You deserved it 4 014

By Justme - 30/06/2016 18:20 - United States - Missoula

Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 118

You deserved it 1 480

By marlow - 15/01/2009 02:25 - Canada

Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 857

You deserved it 2 712

By Anonymous - 14/04/2016 17:04 - United States - Pittsburg

Today, I had to spend a long bus ride with my chest pressed against the window, because some mammoth of a woman decided to squeeze her double wide ass into my seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 588

You deserved it 2 672

By Anonymous - 22/05/2019 16:00

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 709

You deserved it 210

By alice - 14/02/2011 01:18 - United Kingdom

I agree, your life sucks 30 313

You deserved it 3 551

By grossgross - 26/09/2009 18:21 - United States

Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 587

You deserved it 5 533

Pervy

By nameless - 09/11/2010 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got on a bus that was so overcrowded I had to stand next to the driver with nothing to hang on to. A drunk man got on and for the rest of the half hour journey continuously fell on me. When I got off, he smiled and told me as the doors were closing, "The last twelve times was for fun." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 091

You deserved it 2 914

Perdition 4

Monday 9 May 2011 18:52

If you wanted to smell his ass, you could have just asked. Pervert.

thebestof1984 0

Monday 9 May 2011 18:52

Slap that ass!!!

Comments

DRock525 0

Monday 9 May 2011 18:51

gross!

Lustuu_fml 14

Monday 9 May 2011 18:53

Yes, but wtf, it's not a FML at all.

yourbudtravis 0

Monday 9 May 2011 18:54

I know right?

AlwaySunny 0

Monday 9 May 2011 19:01

you should have told him crack is wack

sloppyflow 1

Monday 9 May 2011 19:33

FYL.. really op but YDI for stare back at his ass

dreamering 16

Monday 9 May 2011 19:52

He's a large man with a large ass. I think it's hard to not stare when his ass is two feet far from your face.

bbucaro98 0

Monday 9 May 2011 20:29

thats not gross thats HOT

RaineLee 5

Monday 9 May 2011 20:36

Eww fyl op :/

FarSide 22

Monday 9 May 2011 20:49

Why was his bare ass staring at you? Did his ass think you looked funny?

DrJesse 10

Monday 9 May 2011 21:13

you shouldve spanked him and told him he's a bad boy just to see what he'd do

leader0011 5

Monday 9 May 2011 21:16

that is beyond nasty

savs11 13

Monday 9 May 2011 21:22

At least you didn't see his junk. Or did you? ;)

baldou16 0

Monday 9 May 2011 21:22

I'll have you know that was me and I'm offended!

khaya 9

Monday 9 May 2011 21:56

Taste it see if you like it.

Waffl3z 8

Tuesday 10 May 2011 5:35

Assy Magee.

NovemberJuliette 0

Tuesday 10 May 2011 14:30

lol 54 she stared cuz the ass cracked up at her

nana7_fml 0

Monday 9 May 2011 18:52

wow!

m0tl3ycru3 0

Monday 9 May 2011 20:18

lol he mooned you

pro_13_ 0

Monday 9 May 2011 20:45

give that old man some dollar bills !!!!

m0tl3ycru3 0

Friday 28 October 2011 1:01

Lol he mooned you

Perdition 4

Monday 9 May 2011 18:52

If you wanted to smell his ass, you could have just asked. Pervert.

Death_From_Above 0

Monday 9 May 2011 20:11

I'm surprised she didn't spank it!! ha ha ha

Garyy_fml 11

Monday 9 May 2011 22:20

nice fake picture 3.

that1guyyy 12

Monday 9 May 2011 22:23

obviously it's a fake. it's computer generated, and 3 is a dude.

Garyy_fml 11

Monday 9 May 2011 22:24

and he likes cheese.

PSQ91 6

Monday 9 May 2011 22:26

He speaks dutch too.

msj1093 0

Monday 9 May 2011 23:37

damn that's a hot pic. to bad it's weird ass guy.

OMGIFOUNDWALDO 6

Monday 9 May 2011 23:38

it's the pic of a house/techno channel on youtube, don't hate

womanjesus 0

Tuesday 10 May 2011 4:10

I like the picture

Perdition 4

Tuesday 10 May 2011 17:00

The picture in my profile is actually one that I took, last year, in SoCal. Her name is Vee.

iRhymeWithHeaven 0

Tuesday 10 May 2011 22:11

KUTAIDSVLEKHOER:D Dutch Ftw. no rly im swedish >.>

Perdition 4

Wednesday 11 May 2011 10:49

definitely not a *****. zeker niet een hoer. and Swedish != Dutch. FYI.

thebestof1984 0

Monday 9 May 2011 18:52

Slap that ass!!!

instnt1nfction 17

Monday 9 May 2011 18:54

smack that, all on the floor

AlwaySunny 0

Monday 9 May 2011 18:59

smack that, give me some more

SCREAM4meeee 0

Monday 9 May 2011 19:01

smack that, till you get sore.

malpalll 0

Monday 9 May 2011 20:16

smack that, ohhhhhhhhh

samb222 3

Monday 9 May 2011 20:32

C-C-C-C-COMBO-BREAKER!

Brandnewuser 0

Monday 9 May 2011 20:32

and repeat

instnt1nfction 17

Monday 9 May 2011 21:59

smack that, all on the floor

PSQ91 6

Monday 9 May 2011 22:27

Smack that, give me some more Smack that...

HarryMcC 1

Monday 9 May 2011 23:19

till you get sore

alakomonus 0

Tuesday 10 May 2011 1:04

that was epic

HeavyMetalViking 0

Tuesday 10 May 2011 14:40

and that's all

NaoPudding 8

Monday 9 May 2011 18:53

How pleasant...

kyanisaurus 0

Monday 9 May 2011 18:59

take me to the candy shop...

Ahlph 0

Monday 9 May 2011 19:00

Daddy!!!

MuffyStJacques 0

Monday 9 May 2011 19:02

Did you smack his ass?

mk58 31

Monday 9 May 2011 19:04

Why did you not get up and move? Or even stand if the bus was full?

lovely_leahh 0

Tuesday 10 May 2011 2:45

that's so meannnn!!! :(

DjeePee 24

Monday 9 May 2011 19:06

I hope you said loudly 'Eeeeeeeew, that's ******* gross', so that the whole bus could share in it.

Keywords

Health Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Family Fight Kids Love Relatable Students Work Noise Animals Birds Sleep Mental health Medication Contraception Racism Relationship advice Cheating Pregnancy Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Sex Intimacy Food Revenge Cats

The Top

Today, my fiancée's ex sent me screenshots of their conversation. In it, he told her how badly he’d wanted to marry her, what a great life he'd have given her, and what a huge mistake she'd made by letting him get away. My ring, our house even our pets should’ve been hers. Gee, thanks for settling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 166

You deserved it 133

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 791

You deserved it 1 708

The Top

Today, I've realized that I, an introvert who prefers to be in the comfort of my own home, now prefer to stay out of the house as much as possible, because the obnoxious behavioral issues of my disobedient pets are making my life miserable. Is this how you become a workaholic? FML

I agree, your life sucks 245

You deserved it 1 012

Today, I was masturbating lying on the lower bed of my brother's and my bunk beds. I finished jacking off and tried to get up to clean myself I hit my head on metal panel of the upper bed and passed out. Later woke up in my bed... found out my parents came home and saw me passed out naked holding a porn mag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 358

You deserved it 47 176

Today, to avoid disappointing my excited great grandmother, I still attended a small family dinner to celebrate my engagement. My fiancé and I split last night, I haven't slept and had to tell her he was caught up at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 923

You deserved it 2 139

Today, my boyfriend yelled at me. Apparently I'm not the "classy girl" he thought I was, and he's not comfortable "doing such vile things in public." I had tried to hold his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 880

You deserved it 4 389

Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 189

You deserved it 3 306

Today, like every day, I made myself some coffee with my Keurig, but today I discovered a lot of mold growing inside it. I guess that explains why I've been so sick and feel like my lungs have been on fire the last few weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 898

You deserved it 2 020

Same thing different taste

Three's a crowd

Pervy

Top comments

Comments