Health: Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled...

By Anonymous - 02/10/2012 19:39 - United States - Richland

Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 716

You deserved it 2 956

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 08/09/2013 16:38 - Switzerland - Bern

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 996

You deserved it 3 592

By Pottymouth - 25/07/2009 17:14 - United States

Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 028

You deserved it 24 543

By phoneless - 17/04/2012 19:23 - Jordan

Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 169

You deserved it 26 227

By breakinphones - 20/02/2011 02:03 - United States

Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 636

You deserved it 81 707

Smooth.

By yosmurf - 13/08/2018 23:31

Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 120

You deserved it 1 211

By Kris - 06/12/2010 20:31 - United States

Today, I found my iPhone. Too bad it was when I was getting my clothes out of the washer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 153

You deserved it 29 174

By Anonymous - 05/08/2009 11:04 - India

Today, I left my brand new iPhone on the counter, and went to get its cleaning cloth. My grandmother saw a mosquito, and used my iPhone as a fly swatter. I now have a broken iPhone. Good news though: no more mosquito. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 828

You deserved it 5 778

By ryanharp2 - 27/07/2012 05:05 - United States - Conway

Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 711

You deserved it 42 982

By Paige - 26/12/2011 06:35 - United States

Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 203

You deserved it 52 251

By thesadone - 03/07/2010 06:49 - United States

Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 965

You deserved it 10 757

Psych101 9

Wednesday 3 October 2012 0:00

"I fell on it?"

LlamaUprising 10

Tuesday 2 October 2012 23:58

Classy.

Comments

Zoomali 1

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:17

Was there a signal?

Karmasabiych 7

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:18

How did they manage to do that?!

danx900 7

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:22

But...how?

merimar3 4

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:27

Did you use the iPhone Finder?

MinnieMahem 0

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:28

I can just see the conversation: iphone user: I LOVE IPHONE 5 blackberry: shut up. iphone:I love it!! blackberry: if you dont shut up ill take your phone and shove it up your a**! and thats how it got there..

linkinpark98 23

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:30

Booty call? :D

kyliersb 4

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:35

Anyone else wondering why it was there in the first place?..

iHeartMuzik 0

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:37

tf? iphone 5 is already released?

rosesdarkblue 0

Wednesday 3 October 2012 3:59

Lol FML is source of news too now...

sturnbull 1

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:44

Wtf...

sbstar2017 8

Wednesday 3 October 2012 1:45

How'd it get up there?wait don't answer that, i don't want to know

Keywords

Management Work Awkward Miscellaneous Friends Health Relatable Healthy Lifestyle Mother in law Gifts Family Money Birthday Education Parents Public freakouts Pranks Students Exams Weird Love Argument AITA Fear Insects Skincare Cats Job interview Jealousy Gross

The Top

Today, after receiving the third call this week from teachers about my son falling asleep in class, I decided that it would be a good idea to hide his Xbox controllers. He decided it would be a good idea to hide my diabetes medication. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 638

You deserved it 19 265

Today, I'm meeting my boyfriend's very conservative parents for the first time, so I decided to dress appropriately and curl my hair to match. In doing so, I accidentally touched my neck with the iron, and I now have a burn there that look a lot like a hickey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 982

You deserved it 4 898

The Top

Today, my sister tried to convince me to go to a plastic surgeon, because "Bitchface Syndrome's no joke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 241

You deserved it 3 935

Today, even though I was curious about my ex's new fling, I didn't want to do anything that would put them in an uncomfortable situation. Apparently, that changed when I took an Ambien to get some rest, as I woke up to find out that I'd sleep-followed them. They've already followed me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 367

Today, I spent 12 hours in an airport rather than go back to the apartment of the man I traveled to see for the weekend. Instead of wine, dine, sixty-nine, he took me to a tailgating event and introduced me to two girls he had a threesome with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 054

You deserved it 662

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me. I got a hold of the girl he was cheating on me with. She was as oblivious as I was of each other's existence. Apparently, the fucker told her he lived with his "sister," who's "a bitch and makes his life impossible". He was referring to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 668

You deserved it 2 266

Today, at our wedding reception my new father-in-law gave his speech, saying his little girl was too good for me. Everyone, including my parents, agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 376

You deserved it 3 416

Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 924

You deserved it 14 820

Same thing different taste

Smooth.

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