Work: Today, I fell asleep while on the toilet at work. When I woke...

By XoXonedirectionXoXo - 23/06/2012 22:21 - United States - Eden Prairie

Today, I fell asleep while on the toilet at work. When I woke up, I tried to quietly sneak back to my desk, only to be caught by my boss. He immediately sent me packing and gave his "best wishes" for me in the unemployment line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 262

You deserved it 32 400

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Same thing different taste

By Courtney - 07/11/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on the toilet, and then had to give my boss a valid reason for why I was late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 058

You deserved it 5 225

By Anonymous - 06/04/2016 18:18 - Netherlands - Den Dungen

Today, I fell asleep while taking a dump. At work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 979

You deserved it 4 832

By sleepytime - 05/10/2009 16:36 - United States

Today, I was really, REALLY tired at work. I went to the restroom to take a little break, and must have dozed off, because I was awoken by my boss, knocking on the door of the stall. Apparently, I had been snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 684

You deserved it 32 906

Moving day

By Unemployed - 30/09/2009 09:03 - Malaysia

Today, I fell asleep during my division emergency meeting. As I about to head home that evening, my boss patted me on the back saying, "Wrong move. Good luck". Turned out, it was a meeting to determine who will be kicked out of the company due to recession. My name was written first on the list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 917

You deserved it 54 579

By Anonymous - 21/12/2017 01:30

Today, my boss left early, so I decided to take an extended break and run home. I found my wife in bed with my boss. I got fired for leaving work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 558

You deserved it 519

By jeed(1) - 25/08/2013 21:36 - France - Marseille

Today, at work, I stepped out for a few minutes to use the bathroom. Shortly after returning, I found out the hard way that one of my coworkers had used my computer to send a profanity-filled email to our boss, calling him an asshole and telling him to go fuck himself. I'm now jobless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 647

You deserved it 5 291

By DonPedro - 16/01/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 855

You deserved it 11 379

Bye bye

By Dan - 17/11/2020 22:58

Today, I fell asleep at work. I got woke up by my boss with a coffee and a referral letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 1 058

By anthony512 - 24/05/2013 16:08 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, after a sleepless night, I fell asleep at my work desk. When I awoke, I found my co-workers had duct taped me to my chair. I was yelling at them to untape me, when our boss came in, scolded me for fucking about on the job, and left without saying a word to my colleagues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 026

You deserved it 12 764

By Anonymous - 25/10/2013 09:01 - United States - Cedar Park

Today, I worked 24 hours straight fixing my company's servers. After it was over, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and promptly fell asleep at my desk. My boss found me an hour later, refused to listen to me, and fired me for sleeping on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 602

You deserved it 4 666

obviousboy 8

Sunday 24 June 2012 3:21

YDI simply because of your username.

xoxokelsey11 5

Sunday 24 June 2012 3:19

How long could you have been sleeping in there? Must've been comfortable.

Comments

bwzwally8 15

Friday 29 June 2012 8:17

sounds like a shitty situation.

D3ATHZ3RO 15

Friday 3 May 2013 18:01

How do you sleep on a toilet?

lucasjames22 8

Sunday 2 July 2017 2:21

I'm sorry but sleeping while at work is just stupid. I would fire your ass too.

sharond23 10

Friday 1 December 2017 16:50

You were sleeping on the job. ydi

thefmlman2011 36

Wednesday 15 January 2020 12:14

Your boss was a dick. I wouldn’t fire someone for something like that. But maybe it’s because I’m way too nice

Keywords

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Today, my boyfriend of 5 years almost broke up with me. Why? Our one month old's hair is growing in blonde, and we both have dark hair. Did I cheat? No. I had blonde hair as a child until I was 4... As did everyone else born in my family. I guess this factor doesn't count when you're paranoid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 997

You deserved it 5 687

Today, after I learned a long time ago that it's prudent to smell your shredded cheese as with milk to check its freshness, that lesson came into play when I doubted the quality of some cheese my roommate was going to use for nachos. I smelled it and got the dry heaves from the stink. He can't smell anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 337

You deserved it 64

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Today, my sink seemed to be filling up with dirty water. Concerned, I turned on the garbage disposal and plunged away. With no change in the water levels, I called a plumber. He reached in, pulled out the drain plug, and give me his bill while chuckling to himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 092

You deserved it 45 169

Today, my group of friends, my girlfriend, and I were playing "Never have I ever." My girlfriend's turn came up and she went with, "Never have I ever had an orgasm." FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 041

You deserved it 21 500

Today, my mom picked my ex-boyfriend up early from school to take him to see a special screening of a documentary that's showing in town. She left me after school for an hour and a half because they ended up going out for coffee afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 694

You deserved it 2 605

Today, someone tried to guess my age. They guessed 45, then 39. I'm 35 and just spent $20,000 on plastic surgery to make myself look more youthful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 1 732

Today, I found out that if you see a tray with some black stuff in it and you can't decide whether it's powdered black pepper or cigarette ashes, it's not a good idea to taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 205

You deserved it 50 151

Today, a young woman on the subway asked me to hold her pocket mirror open in front of her. I asked why. She replied: "It's easier to pop my pimples." FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 64

Same thing different taste

Moving day

Bye bye

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