Miscellaneous: Today, at football practice, a 200lb lineman ended up landing...

By FirstStringQB - 01/10/2011 22:45 - United States

Today, at football practice, a 200lb lineman ended up landing on my stomach. The weight made me shit myself. My new nickname is "Muddbutt". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 263

You deserved it 4 731

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/08/2012 00:46 - United States - Oregon

Today, at football practice, the biggest lineman shouldered me so hard in the groin that my protective cup pushed back with enough force to crack the bone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 797

You deserved it 2 132

By Shameful - 18/01/2012 19:57 - United States

Today, my school's 6'2, 270-pound, 375-pound bench-pressing football superstar knocked me unconscious in one hit. With a dodgeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 844

You deserved it 3 784

By Anonymous - 28/04/2009 04:35 - United States

Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 367

You deserved it 13 529

Baywatch

By Jenn - 16/12/2016 00:50

Today, in my lifeguarding course, I had to pull a 200-pound boy out of the pool in an exercise to practice using our legs when lifting. I, being only 90 pounds, tried pulling and ended up falling into the pool, landing with my lady parts on his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 224

You deserved it 836

By authorsubmit - 04/05/2012 12:49 - United States

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 859

You deserved it 47 638

By GoDiarrhea - 04/03/2010 18:52 - Argentina

Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at taekwondo practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear". He did this in front of all my classmates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 450

You deserved it 2 839

By Anonymous - 31/07/2014 05:00 - Australia - Darlinghurst

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 083

You deserved it 5 102

By DangerZone - 12/11/2009 03:05 - United States

Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 947

You deserved it 5 112

By StickyWicket - 14/05/2019 18:00

Today, at work where I'm a physiotherapist, I was helping a patient with lower back pain. While I was massaging him, he shat himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 067

You deserved it 129

By Craptastic - 15/09/2018 15:00

Today, at physical therapy, I felt that all-too-familiar gurgle in my gut, but I thought it would a light, silent fart. I squatted for an exercise and shit my pants in front of the cute, single, male physical therapist. He definitely noticed. I still had 30 minutes left in the session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 809

You deserved it 651

deviable 9

Sunday 2 October 2011 2:21

Don't worry, at least you're not called Skidmarks.

minder97 10

Sunday 2 October 2011 2:22

hopefully some of your shit got on the guy

Comments

perdix 29

Sunday 2 October 2011 8:09

I guess your team already has a Professor Poopypants?

itzProPain 10

Sunday 2 October 2011 9:06

i guess u had a shitty day LOL

fatalwish 6

Sunday 2 October 2011 9:07

200 lbs is pretty big for like hs level ball lucky you werent seriously injured start noticing darker than normal stool go straight to the docs office man internal bleeding is no joke

Shafena 8

Sunday 2 October 2011 9:44

at least you ain't a 'mudblood' heh

lacrosse_king 5

Sunday 2 October 2011 10:49

Buddy 200 lbs is nothing for linemen, man up unless your 12 or something

monqueezy 3

Sunday 2 October 2011 11:44

That shit must of hurt.. :)

MainPrism 16

Sunday 2 October 2011 12:03

That's f*ckin' EPIC!!! Lmfao

51081998 0

Sunday 2 October 2011 14:44

What about 270 pound 13 yearold linemen I have game today hope I can do this to the guy I'm tackling

patandjulia 8

Sunday 2 October 2011 14:49

A 200lb lineman isnt even alot the running backs on my team are around that manup mudbutt

kurlyfries222 0

Sunday 2 October 2011 14:53

Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt, Muddbutt,