Health, Fire and Miscellaneous: This is lit - FML

This is lit

By a genius - 12/02/2009 13:28 - United States

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 907

You deserved it 60 271

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Same thing different taste

By kaycie_lynn - 19/02/2010 01:11 - United States

Today, I chuckled at a "No Smoking" sign as I lit my cigarette. I bent my head down to light it and somehow managed to light my hair on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 769

You deserved it 71 589

Smoke 'em while you can

By OuttaNowhere81 - 15/05/2009 04:05 - United States

Today, I was smoking a cigarette in my backyard while my parents were out, because I'm not allowed to smoke. While smoking, my parents came home unexpectedly. In a rush, I flicked it over the fence, and it landed in my neighbor's hair. It was still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 624

You deserved it 73 888

Close but no cigar

By Anonymous - 23/12/2015 23:26

Today, while lighting a cigar, I set my beard on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 604

You deserved it 15 127

By RingofFire - 03/06/2016 23:23 - United States - Edenville

Today, I was standing on the patio when one of my upstairs neighbors threw a cigarette butt over the balcony. It landed on my head and burned some of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 285

You deserved it 1 745

By Anonymous - 22/01/2017 18:00

Today, I quit smoking cigarettes. While driving to work, the car in front of me flicked his out the window, flying straight into mine. It set the bottom of my seat on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 391

You deserved it 550

By crayons128 - 24/01/2011 06:13 - United States

Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 045

You deserved it 6 597

By Seriously? - 15/05/2013 21:47 - United States - Irvine

Today, while sitting at a red light with my window down, the asshat next to me flicked his still-lit cigarette away. It landed in my car and wedged between me and my seat. It burned a hole in my shirt and my seat, and burned my back and hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 392

You deserved it 3 524

By Poser - 20/12/2009 04:24 - Canada

Today, I was at a bar and met this great guy. He was going outside for a smoke and I wanted to go too. Since I don't smoke, I decided to borrow one of my friends cigarettes as an excuse to go outside with him. As I was lighting the cigarette, he pointed out that I was lighting the wrong end. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 228

You deserved it 46 152

By Anonymous - 08/04/2011 15:30 - United States

Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 924

You deserved it 54 297

By anonymous - 05/02/2014 02:48 - United States

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 922

You deserved it 45 085

Next

Top comments

deeznutzismine 0

Thursday 12 February 2009 16:30

Surgeon General is right - Smoking CAN kill you! or ... at least light your head on fire.

EMG1 0

Thursday 12 February 2009 22:03

Oh well, smoking is bad!

Comments

kayellexx 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 4:04

Guess you shouldn't have been smoking. Dumbass

thor74 5

Thursday 9 June 2016 7:13

You're a Dick

skahittles 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 22:52

that's happened to me so many times. now i just pull back my hair before i light up

fmylife13 0

Friday 6 March 2009 4:04

that's what you get for smoking

studette 0

Friday 6 March 2009 7:35

Smoking kills!

sasquatch_223 0

Sunday 15 March 2009 13:44

Thats what you get for smoking.

Laughing_is_cool 4

Saturday 21 March 2009 5:06

i literally LOLd

MissOtaku_fml 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 16:43

HA i need to remember this story when I have kids!!!

BayArea 1

Friday 17 April 2009 6:33

ROFL

Curly_Wurly 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:37

Hahaha!One day I took a cigarette out of my mouth(while intoxicated) to talk to a police officer,when I put it back in,guess which end I put in first... OUCH.

kathira120 3

Wednesday 3 June 2009 23:14

Well, you're an idiot for smoking anyway. Pigs who smoke are disgusting. Burn in hell, and take a pack of Virginia Slims with you (the fire there will be nice for lighting cigarettes!)

Ohshitdude 21

Thursday 15 January 2015 20:16

Sounds like you have issuses that bitching at people who smoke WILL NOT solve. Invest in therapy.

emanhernandez 22

Thursday 17 March 2016 21:27

I ment to dis like this not li it damn

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Keywords

Work Management Jealousy Love Mental health Relationship advice Relatable Awkward Miscellaneous Friends Healthy Lifestyle Health Food Ironic Gifts Mother in law Money Birthday Family Public freakouts Education Parents Pranks Students Exams Weird Argument AITA Fear Insects

The Top

Today, I rang British Gas to cancel my boiler cover, as I'm totally and utterly skint. I told her the reason was I was getting divorced, moving house, losing my job, and had no income at all. She was very sympathetic, and said, "How would you like to pay your £37 cancellation fee?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 864

You deserved it 4 026

Today, I had a tooth pulled. An hour or so later, I removed the gauze from my mouth, because I thought the bleeding had stopped. I got on my laptop. A few minutes later I looked down, to see that I had drooled blood all over the keyboard, and didn't know because my mouth was numb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 874

You deserved it 33 942

The Top

Today, I decided to surprise my girlfriend by cooking her dinner. I spent hours preparing and making sure everything was perfect. I lit candles, set the table, and even put on some soft music. When she came home, she'd already eaten and wasn't hungry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 862

You deserved it 144

Today, I signed up for an online dating site. In order to prove I was human and complete my registration, I had to pass a CAPTCHA. Coincidentally enough, the words in it were "depressed" and "loser". FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 155

You deserved it 7 584

Today, I spent hours cooking dinner for my date. When they arrived, they told me that I'd probably not paid much attention to their dating profile, as it clearly mentioned that they were vegan, and thus couldn't eat any of the food I'd prepared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 259

You deserved it 1 279

Today, having made absolutely sure I wouldn't have work until 4 p.m., I slept peacefully to recover from staying up till 5 a.m. to watch my country in the World Cup. Until at 8 a.m., someone on the floor above started drilling. No one has done any drilling day or night in the last six months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 147

Today, I performed for the first time at someone's wedding. When the music started, I heard a click. Slowly, I felt my strapless bra drop lower and lower due to my non-existent breasts. The hook on my bra had broken at that very moment on stage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 914

You deserved it 740

Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 231

You deserved it 9 105