Intimacy: Spunky

Spunky

By grimatwork - 01/11/2010 17:24 - United Kingdom

Today, after taking my jacket off at work, I found a large faint stain all across one side of my shirt. Turns out that my fiancé had used it to "clean up the bed." I am the manager of a supermarket with 40 employees. It was pretty obvious what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 438

You deserved it 5 436

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

By g_unit - 10/12/2009 05:24 - Canada

Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 647

You deserved it 2 614

By Sbfreak510 - 16/10/2009 16:30 - France

Today, I was in a hurry to get to work and I put on yesterday's jeans. While at my meeting an employee asked me if 'that' was mine and pointed to something on the floor next to me. Which was yesterday's underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 307

You deserved it 31 128

By ewwy - 10/10/2010 06:54 - United States

Today, I returned a friend's jacket after borrowing it. I made sure to wash it and keep it clean. When he went to put it on, a pair of my granny panties fell out of the sleeve. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 990

You deserved it 7 656

By Diet_Water - 14/02/2016 05:01 - United States - Moreno Valley

Today, I wore my boyfriend's favorite shirt to surprise him and show him how sexy I look. He made me take it off and pay the bill for dry cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 886

You deserved it 4 700

Not what you think

By Anonymous - 28/05/2023 06:00

Today, I was running late to work so I started getting dressed and brushing my teeth. I got to work 5 minutes late, which is when noticed a toothpaste stain on my shirt. I thought it looked identical to a cum stain, and the worst part was I was wearing black, so it was noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 634

You deserved it 228

By peteswentzbass - 26/01/2013 17:18 - Netherlands - Nuenen

Today, my roommate and I noticed a foul smell in our apartment. After looking around for a little while, I found that her cat had pooped on a pair of my jeans, and apparently tried to cover it up by dragging a shirt over the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 017

You deserved it 3 406

Filthy animal

By Chris - 25/01/2022 14:01

Today, I work maintenance at a warehouse store. I had to clean the men's stall because someone had pooped on the seat, the floor, and got some on the wall. When I took my break, I noticed that my fellow maintenance coworker had poop on his pants and shoes. I then realized that I just cleaned up his “mess.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 223

You deserved it 104

You tried

By Anonymous - 22/01/2021 00:01 - Australia

Today, my colleague was wearing a beautiful dress. I decided that I had to go over and compliment her. As I walked over, my coffee cup flew out of my hand and onto said dress. She had to go home and change, and my boss had to cover for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 963

You deserved it 414

Invaded

By icanteven - 12/09/2013 01:12 - United States - Florence

Today, one of my employees called in after his 8-hour shift, explaining that he had bed bugs at home, found one on his shirt, and thinks they are in the store. I own a mattress shop. They'd spread. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 936

You deserved it 2 932

By LaundryVictim - 15/06/2016 20:50

Today, I picked up my laundry from the wash-and-fold and proceeded to put everything away. I noticed a hand towel that wasn't mine and made a mental note to return it; turned out they'd given me someone else's boxers as well. My boyfriend doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 574

You deserved it 1 134

cockymofo 10

Monday 1 November 2010 22:59

lol. he said "jacked off"

Fortuitous 0

Monday 1 November 2010 23:15

You didn't see that one coming.

Comments

HMayy 4

Tuesday 2 November 2010 22:57

Has she not heard of a washing machine...?

EpicPear 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 7:06

jacket off at work - jack it off at work

LaurenCMcCoy 17

Wednesday 3 November 2010 16:31

Yuck lol. Though you kind of deserve it for not looking at your clothes before you put them on, and then not noticing in the mirror?

TheNewGuy03 28

Wednesday 3 November 2010 16:31

you must have gotten LOADS of attention at work... |the kid|

pertained 12

Wednesday 3 November 2010 17:44

i thought it was a period stain..

Miguel_32E 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 5:15

wow im 13 and know what shes talkin bout

adamq 1

Saturday 6 November 2010 13:16

Maybe you should SWALLOW from now on.

5t3ff1k4h 44

Saturday 6 November 2010 17:19

Maybe the dude was masturbating while his girl was at work.

the4starr 3

Sunday 7 November 2010 11:42

keep the jacket on. no matter how hot it felt in there!

klx125cross 9

Tuesday 7 August 2012 4:12

Hahaha!

Maria_Craigen 9

Sunday 20 October 2013 9:45

Sounds like your in a spot. What a mess. Really came out of no where.

Keywords

Parents Education Public freakouts Mother in law Love Argument AITA Miscellaneous Fear Insects Health Skincare Cats Jealousy Work Gross Coworkers Drugs Dogs Animals Awkward Fire Transportation Cars Scams Money Bikes Scary Neighbours Sex

The Top

Today, I fell asleep in the car on a 10+ hour trip with my family as soon as we got on the highway. When I woke up an hour later, I realized I'd had a wet dream. I had to sit next to my grandma with semen all over my thighs and boxers for the rest of the trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 141

You deserved it 11 901

Today, I was at a wedding reception. Everyone got offended when I threw my hands up and backed off to avoid catching the garter and let the two guys on either side fight for it. Nothing but laughs for the cousin who grabbed the bouquet out of someone else's hand and punched her, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 425

You deserved it 84

The Top

Today, I injured my knee and dislocated my shoulder fighting over a cookie with my brother. He's 14. I'm 26. He still got the cookie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 383

You deserved it 37 271

Today, I went horseback riding with this guy I like. I asked him to help me get on the horse. I slipped, and while trying to keep my balance, I kicked him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 940

You deserved it 5 727

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 381

You deserved it 4 984

Today, I got confused and said grace before brushing my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 775

You deserved it 5 597

Today, I gave my 16 year old step daughter and her friends a lecture on respecting other people's privacy. Two hours later, I accidentally walked into her room without knocking. She and her friends were giving each other bikini waxes. Now her friends call me the hypocritical pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 534

You deserved it 80 144

Today, I finally reached the age where me just being alive annoys my wife. She asked me during a movie if I “have to breathe like that because it’s so damn annoying.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 816

You deserved it 154