Birthday, Awkward and Love: Red flag - FML

Red flag

By katwingz - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Fairfield

Today, after being together for only two weeks, my boyfriend got me a year's gym membership for my birthday, in a card that said, "So u can b hott! Luv u!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 295

You deserved it 6 333

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Top comments

Izabushel 65

Wednesday 20 February 2013 9:15

So I take it you will be getting him spelling lessons?

Tolarie 13

Wednesday 20 February 2013 9:18

Get hot, and then dump him?

Comments

Tmar97 1

Thursday 21 February 2013 4:16

Do you even lift?

megmichelle45 3

Thursday 21 February 2013 5:24

that was insensitive of him, but really, it's a great gift. use it! not to just look better, but to feel better, too. take advantage of the opportunity

183933 6

Thursday 21 February 2013 7:12

Keep the gym membership and dump the boyfriend so you can be hot and single.

emilyloves1D 5

Thursday 21 February 2013 7:42

Hate guys like that.

natalalaliee 9

Thursday 21 February 2013 8:37

Take advantage of it!

ouibijou 15

Thursday 21 February 2013 9:21

Better get out before it starts to hurt. Physically and emotionally.

Baybiiie 11

Thursday 21 February 2013 9:53

And why are you upset? Free gym membership and he's paid for it?!!! I'd kiss him and hug him!

InfiniteSecret 20

Sunday 10 September 2017 13:00

He got it so they could change to look what they want them to look like.

mr_sarcastic416 29

Thursday 21 February 2013 9:54

Return it to him in a blank card, in the card write "So you can be single"

lita89 6

Thursday 21 February 2013 18:21

That's awesome! I'm jealous! I wish I could go to the gym for free!!

chuka81 27

Thursday 21 February 2013 19:07

If OP isn't hot, I don't see what's wronh with a free gym membership...lose those extra calories

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Keywords

Management Work Love Jealousy Relatable Relationship advice Mental health Miscellaneous Friends Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Ironic Food Family Money Birthday Mother in law Gifts Public freakouts Education Parents Students Exams Pranks Weird Argument AITA Insects Fear

The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me that in order for me to be considered for marriage, I need to prove that I can be a subservient woman. This includes signing over the deed to my house, my car, and all my banking assets, so that he can be “the man of the house.” I make 6 figures; he rents with roommates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 817

You deserved it 157

Today, I came from a 12-hour shift to find my clothes and stuff outside, and the locks changed. I called my mom to let me in and she told me, “Hell the fuck no, I’m not having a drug addicted junkie up in my house! You’re no longer my daughter!” and hung up. Apparently, she found my stash of weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 689

The Top

Today, I came home from the hospital after six days. Despite having a cat sitter, they managed to shit on the bathroom floor and pee on my bed in protest for being gone too long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 798

You deserved it 123

Today, while I was taking a shower, my boyfriend came into the bathroom to ask me a question. When I got out of the shower, I was greeted with a horrifying cutout of Michael Jackson. I fell backwards, shattering the glass shower door. I needed stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 794

You deserved it 2 026

Today, a grasshopper jumped into my car. As my boyfriend swiped at it, the grasshopper jumped onto my chest and into my shirt. Instead of helping me get it out, my boyfriend leaned back and said, "It got to second base faster than I did." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 231

You deserved it 10 345

Today, my boyfriend and I were house sitting. We were a little on edge because we'd heard noises. We were starting to get intimate, and suddenly the house alarm started going off. We locked ourselves in the room, called the police, and they told us that we were the ones who'd set it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 195

You deserved it 3 103

Today, my husband has a biker chick Facebook friend and this morning he posted on her page, calling her "the prettiest girl at the barn dance." She's a "friend" of mine as well, so I saw it in my feed. I asked him WTH? He got mad at me, accused me of spying on him, and now won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 651

You deserved it 117

Today, I was on an adult-orientated website when my mother entered the room. I closed the webpage as fast as I could by clicking everywhere. I discovered later that, while panicking, I clicked on “share on Facebook”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 574

You deserved it 406