Intimacy, Sex, Embarrassing and Awkward: Mortifying

Mortifying

By Anonymous - 15/07/2015 16:29 - United States - Katy

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say, "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 249

You deserved it 2 746

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/04/2015 10:05 - South Africa - Pretoria

Today, I snuck downstairs to watch a midnight movie. One moment I'm trying to plug my headphones in, in the dark, and the next my dad's beating the shit out of me with a baseball bat. Turns out he snuck down after me for a midnight snack and thought I was a burglar disconnecting the TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 176

You deserved it 5 299

By scarred - 27/07/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I heard my parents having sex for the first time so I turned the TV up really loud to drown out the noise, and a minute or two later my mom comes downstairs in this skimpy nightgown to ask me why the TV was so loud and, seeing the horror on my face, kept asking what was wrong with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 014

You deserved it 3 944

By wtf - 16/05/2014 22:25 - Australia - Narangba

Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 601

You deserved it 14 980

Lock it up

By stickyface - 24/10/2010 05:18 - Canada

Today, I decided to be adventurous and give my boyfriend head in the downstairs TV room. Just as he was about to come, I heard someone walking towards the door. I took my mouth off to get up and lock the door right as he came. I didn't make it to the door but my dad saw something he will never forget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 039

You deserved it 41 715

By fmjob - 21/07/2009 04:39 - Canada

Today, I finally told my parents I would be changing bedrooms because I could no longer stand hearing them having sex, which is awkward and disturbing. Later, my dad came and asked me quietly if I thought my mom sounded "satisfied." FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 260

You deserved it 6 247

Quick, hide!

By Mattyboy - 24/08/2009 09:57 - United States

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend at her house. When things started heating up, I heard the front door open and my girlfriend said that it must be her Dad. She handed me my clothes, pushed me out the window, and told me to knock at the front door. Her Dad answered, holding my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 930

You deserved it 18 640

Didn't see you there

By eatmyshipoopie - 18/12/2009 15:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 607

You deserved it 10 108

By Tiana - 29/01/2012 02:34 - Canada

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 339

You deserved it 9 264

By NO NO NO - 05/08/2013 21:42 - Netherlands - Den Haag

Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 515

You deserved it 5 352

By Eminnis - 31/08/2015 03:27 - United States - Woodland Park

Today, I walked in on my dad completely naked. When I expressed my displeasure, he told me to knock next time. I'd agree with him, if he hadn't been standing in the middle of the hallway in our very open living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 316

You deserved it 1 690

smile2312 16

Thursday 16 July 2015 0:00

oh goodness, what happened after???

carebear1228 20

Thursday 16 July 2015 0:03

another victim petrified by thier father's basilisk.

Comments

creepyclowntown 10

Thursday 16 July 2015 1:42

That sucks,I don't think I could handle my dad saying anything to me for awhile

allyiscute1 22

Thursday 16 July 2015 1:48

I really want to know what happened after like did you just turn the light off and run back to your room did you TALK about it?!:O

vikky538 28

Thursday 16 July 2015 1:49

Just imagine... What would happened to your mom is she was there... I am hoping your dad is expecting your mom at that time...

ShowMeKay 20

Thursday 16 July 2015 5:29

I don't think OP wants to imagine what her parents would be doing lol

Jflowers9296 14

Thursday 16 July 2015 1:50

At least all you did was hear him speaking and the sound a zipper. :/ still bad though sorry OP

PANDORUM89 21

Thursday 16 July 2015 1:57

F both of your lives! seriously that has to be so awkward saying that to your daughter. gives me the heebies.

SabrinaEpic3 15

Thursday 16 July 2015 2:23

I am laughing SO hard right now! X'DDDD I'm sorry but this made my night!

persianchick 13

Thursday 16 July 2015 2:56

I feel so bad for you

mds9986 24

Thursday 16 July 2015 3:32

Today, my wife said she wasn't feeling into sex this morning, so I went downstairs to watch tv. Soon after, I heard the door open so I said "I knew you'd change your mind, get them panties off" and unzipped my pants. It was my daughter. FML

LycanGod 27

Thursday 16 July 2015 3:35

wow talk about the beginning of nightmares lol

Hop6e 22

Thursday 16 July 2015 3:41

Ohmigawd. Ohmigawd!! OHMIGAWD. You poor thing. Are you okay? Did u say something? What happened? R u both still talking? At least you know now your parents are totally into each other...