It's not what you think…

By sucks - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Spicy
Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserts dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said, "How do you like that?" Then my mom walked in. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 930
You deserved it 158 967

Top comments

thats so wrong, but so ******* hilarious at the same time!

Comments

caits13 0

You. Have. SERIOUS. Problems, my friend.

ch_kisama 0

YDI. next time push him off of you like a normal person

That's awesome. Good idea in theory (people are laughing but it could definitely work--it's not like you were getting any pleasure from it) but ROFL that you got caught.

dreamofme 0

You should've told your mom that it's okay, and that you're glad she knows. And then that she shouldn't worry, because you intend to do the right thing, and marry the dog. Points if you make her faint.

That's soooooooo messed up! Why would u do that?

#1, #10, #15... Thumbs up for posts.

What the ****, dude. that is absolutely MESSED UP. >.

Dogs establish dominance by play fighting with each other, not humping each other. The best thing for you to have done would have been to make your dog lay down and then restrict his movements, if he raised his head, you gently but firmly push it back down, until he keeps it down for an extended time. This exerts both your dominance over the dog and lets them know that such behavior isn't acceptable. Baboons and other monkeys, on the other hand, do hump to establish dominance. So if you want to hump something to establish dominance, get a baboon.