Sex and Intimacy: Incel vibes - FML

Incel vibes

By unlucky - 05/08/2009 16:29 - South Africa

Spicy

Today, I was talking with a close friend (who is a virgin) about why he didn't want to have sex with a prostitute. He told me that, "It's not nice to know that the girl you are having sex with has slept with half the country." He then added, "That's exactly why I wouldn't have sex with you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 230

You deserved it 65 211

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Same thing different taste

A tale as old as time

By I'm_Not_Interested - 06/07/2015 05:30 - United States - Reno

Spicy

Today, I found out the only reason why a friend of mine even bothered talking to me. He thought that I'd sleep with him if he was nice enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 206

You deserved it 2 894

By herpderp - 11/02/2009 00:41 - United States

Today, someone in class was making a point about premarital intercourse - "90% of teen virgins aren't saving it for marriage, they just can't get any." Another classmate pointed me out specifically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 386

You deserved it 3 608

Waiting for that special someone

By foreveralone - 10/07/2020 17:04

Today, just like at every gynecologist's appointment in the last 5 years, I had to yet again explain that no, I'm not a virgin at 27 because I'm waiting till marriage, I'm just a loser that no-one wants to sleep with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 678

You deserved it 221

By Laura - 17/09/2010 00:35 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend of three years decided it was finally time to have sex. After we did, he told me that he was sleeping with another girl. He wanted to have sex with me to see who was better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 739

You deserved it 6 220

By EliseV - 03/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Chino Hills

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 945

You deserved it 5 999

Testing the waters

By Anonymousss95 - 10/12/2011 12:03 - Sweden

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. Afterwards, he told me that he was only doing this because he wanted to know if he still truly loves his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 694

You deserved it 13 384

Timing is important

By effingdoucher - 30/01/2011 06:07 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with a guy I met at my friend's party. He stopped mid-thrust, climbed off, and started talking about how nervous he is about buying his first car next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 831

You deserved it 11 021

By Anonymous - 10/02/2015 14:51 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, a cute girl was telling me about her weird fetishes. I jokingly said, "Remind me never to have sex with you". She replied, "Don't worry, I have standards". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 491

You deserved it 20 896

By Lisa - 11/08/2018 03:30

Today, I slept with a friend who always bitches about how he can't keep a girlfriend. When he finished within 3 minutes I understood why. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 080

You deserved it 956

If only…

By ActuallyDoneFor - 10/11/2018 10:30 - Canada - Saint Albert

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I had a friend over. This friend was talking about how 2 girls were trying to get with him. My boyfriend says, "I wouldn't ever fuck the blonde one, but I would do the other one in a heartbeat." Then, realizing what he said, he hesitantly added "…if I was single." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 597

You deserved it 480

Next

Top comments

ChiliRamen 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 23:03

Sounds like a conversation I had with a very close friend of mine. Then we ended up dating :-p

qwertyone 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 23:06

It sounds like he was joking. That or you actually do sleep around too much. For the sake of humanity I hope it's the former.

Comments

Yawk 1

Sunday 25 May 2014 6:01

FYL for being judged For your sexuality

dccomics94 12

Wednesday 25 June 2014 5:51

Yeah, sorry honey, but YDI for being slutty.

TheIronFez 13

Thursday 7 May 2015 5:22

Sorry, I accidentally pressed FYL.

QuagD 17

Saturday 28 November 2015 13:46

Sick burns are life.

west546 13

Friday 1 January 2016 10:09

Hes probably being a little jokester

shannon2348 14

Wednesday 9 October 2019 5:21

so I'm guessing that maybe you have a bit of a reputation??

Keywords

Management Work Jealousy Love Relatable Mental health Relationship advice Miscellaneous Friends Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Ironic Food Money Birthday Family Mother in law Gifts Parents Public freakouts Education Exams Students Pranks Weird Argument AITA Insects Fear

The Top

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 027

You deserved it 5 457

Today, I had a tooth pulled. An hour or so later, I removed the gauze from my mouth, because I thought the bleeding had stopped. I got on my laptop. A few minutes later I looked down, to see that I had drooled blood all over the keyboard, and didn't know because my mouth was numb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 874

You deserved it 33 942

The Top

Today, my dad decided to clean his muddy shoes right beside me by clapping them together, causing mud to fly all over me. This wouldn't have been a problem had I not been wearing my white wedding dress just before getting married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 944

You deserved it 3 871

Today, after nearly three weeks of hard work, I finally completed my best drawing yet, a self-portrait. I was incredibly excited to take it to class tomorrow. That is, until I came home from a walk later on, only to find my brother had drawn a stick figure on it, wanking into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 546

You deserved it 4 335

Today, it's my 30th birthday. I was having a great night until I overheard my mother say, "I can't believe that thing made it to 30." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 779

You deserved it 2 653

Today, I texted my flatmate to ask him when he would be paying his portion of the rent, since he has told me he would be late this month. He wrote back to inform me that he had moved out last night while I was away, and that he won't be paying me anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 183

You deserved it 2 459

Today, I went out for the afternoon leaving my younger brother at home. He's never had a girlfriend, which I always put down to him being shy and a little overweight. Well, I came home early to walk in on him taking it up the arse from his uni buddy. Off the charts awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 472

You deserved it 568

Today, after work, I peeled a parking ticket off my windshield. It was so hot that the ink from the ticket made a stamp on my windshield. Now I have a permanent reminder staring me in the face wherever I drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 633

You deserved it 7 885