Inappropriate, Cars and Intimacy: Inappropriate

Inappropriate

By aninnocentonlooker - 04/12/2011 05:35 - United States

Today, I was driving my drunk best friend and his "new friend" back to his house. Halfway, this new friend started to give him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 495

You deserved it 3 903

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/07/2009 01:53 - United States

Today, my friend got drunk. He always pukes when he gets drunk, but I decided to drive him home anyway. He didn't puke the whole ride. We arrived at his house and he got out. Right as I was about to drive away he stumbled back to my car because he forgot his wallet. He grabbed it and puked on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 417

You deserved it 6 081

By Sam - 03/12/2011 10:03 - United States

Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 024

You deserved it 9 617

By bestbfever - 17/05/2017 02:00

Today, my drunk boyfriend called me by my best friend's name in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 834

You deserved it 409

By Inconnu - 18/06/2011 05:13 - France

Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 572

You deserved it 3 857

Oh what a night

By EmployeeOfTheMonth - 09/06/2013 23:33 - United States - Montpelier

Today, I attempted to make a good impression amongst new coworkers by volunteering to be the designated driver at my work party. What did that get me? A backseat full of puke and some idiot too drunk to remember where he lived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 458

You deserved it 9 130

By THOMASisMYname - 06/07/2011 17:06 - Canada

Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 848

You deserved it 4 609

By justafriend - 28/05/2017 00:00

Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 244

You deserved it 365

By Tomaino - 18/08/2019 04:02

Today, my best friend got drunk and told me he's only friends with me because no one else will be friends with him. He then went on to tell me that he wasn't actually that drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 699

You deserved it 143

By Anonymous - 18/05/2009 06:45 - Canada

Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 988

You deserved it 23 997

TMI

By Anonymous - 26/09/2010 23:52 - United States

Today, I learned that my girlfriend gives good head. I didn't find out by getting one, I found out by my drunk best friend telling me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 876

You deserved it 3 027

aFreedom127 9

Sunday 4 December 2011 12:49

Nothing beats a good BJ.

Enslaved 36

Sunday 4 December 2011 12:59

Did you keep both hands on the wheel?

Comments

nado13579 12

Monday 5 December 2011 23:45

If the friend is a guy... This would be interesting to see their reactions when you tell them once they're sober. :]

bandit6 2

Tuesday 6 December 2011 7:16

I kinda get the idea that the "new friend" is another guy. OP is finding out his best friend is gay.

nelsokev 6

Tuesday 6 December 2011 22:51

You never said the sex of his new friend. So if its a female that's cool just don't watch. If its a dude fest that's messed FYL

hookemhrns 0

Thursday 8 December 2011 2:48

Yep!! Roadie!

BGirlCloud 4

Friday 9 December 2011 0:16

The awkwardness man. THE AWKWARDNESS.

shots1996 8

Friday 9 December 2011 2:52

Jealous?

harlan71 0

Friday 9 December 2011 22:43

I've had this happen but I only found out by looking in my mirror to see who was bright lighting me

Jordan740 6

Saturday 10 December 2011 6:19

Try your best to keep your eyes on the ROAD

FuckJordansLife 3

Wednesday 21 December 2011 19:32

why pay for **** when you see the real thing for free?

chubby_choco 17

Wednesday 18 January 2012 1:09

For future reference: it it totally legit to stop the car and kick BOTH their horny asses out so they can walk home if that happens again.

Keywords

Management Work Love Jealousy Relatable Relationship advice Mental health Miscellaneous Friends Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Food Ironic Money Birthday Family Mother in law Gifts Public freakouts Parents Education Students Exams Pranks Weird Argument AITA Insects Fear

The Top

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 025

You deserved it 5 457

Today, I broke a world record on third-wheeling with my friend and his girlfriend. As we were driving back from the beach, I took a nap and woke up to my friend receiving head in the front seat. They knew I was awake, but they continued and finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 701

You deserved it 1 016

The Top

Today, I finally went to the doctor's office to have a small patch of acne on my stomach looked at. Since it was in an almost perfect circle and abnormally sensitive, I was worried it could be ringworm or some other sort of skin infection. It turned out to be an infection alright. Herpes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 022

You deserved it 4 359

Today, I was at a professional hockey game. I wasn't paying attention and a puck was shot into the stands and hit me in the face. My mouth was bleeding and I lost two teeth. As I was trying to cough up my teeth the old man next to me shoved me over and stole the puck. Everyone cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 179

You deserved it 5 579

Today, my dog hates my neighbor so much, she forms a shit barrier in their yard to keep them away from my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 244

You deserved it 1 882

Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 612

You deserved it 2 724

Today, I finally found out why all three of my roommates were ignoring me. They like to disinfect everything every time they use it, and I don't. They had a problem with that, so they were hoping that by not talking to me, I'd "notice something was wrong and change." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 919

You deserved it 875

Today, my fiancé and I had to attend a wedding. Problem is, I suffer from a severe form of social anxiety. Since I was getting too close to a panic attack, he suggested drinking some wine to help me stay calm, and it worked. Up until I got drunk and threw up in the middle of the restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 398

You deserved it 2 782

Inappropriate

Same thing different taste

Oh what a night

TMI

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