Intimacy: Gift for you

Gift for you

By safetyfirst - 14/07/2010 15:17 - Taiwan

Today, I decided to buy my Chinese Studies professor a gift from Taiwan. So I bought her a mini-Taiwanese passport that said "Republic of China" on it. As it turns out, it was actually a two-pack of travel condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 442

You deserved it 21 444

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Same thing different taste

It's the thought that counts, right?

By Anonymous - 22/12/2019 18:00

Today, I decided to buy my Chinese Studies professor a gift from Taiwan, so I got her a mini-Taiwanese passport that said "Republic of China" on it. As it turns out, it was actually a two-pack of travel condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 247

You deserved it 2 942

By badtrip - 03/03/2009 03:21 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was packing for her study abroad program. Jokingly, I got her a pack of condoms. She laughed, saying "Oh yeah, I'll definitely need some of those." Later, I showed up to take her to the airport and saw her open suitcase in the kitchen, with the condoms on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 295

You deserved it 33 468

By DosSantos - 03/08/2017 00:30

Today, I returned from a trip to Budapest with more condoms than I had brought with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 465

You deserved it 938

By PentiumBawls8 - 20/01/2010 22:38 - United States

Today, while at my job, I walked past one of my colleagues who has been sick for the past couple of days. She knows that I'm a tea drinker and asked me for a tea bag. While conversing with her, I handed her one and left. I then later realized that I gave her a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 162

You deserved it 32 902

By Miguel - 20/08/2011 19:40 - United States

Today, in algebra, I took out my notebook. My Chinese teacher was so impressed with my "Chinese" writings on the cover that I'm now her "favorite student". Those "Chinese" symbols are actually Japanese, but I wanted someone to like me so badly that I didn't correct her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 306

You deserved it 5 635

By notthatkinkyanyway - 13/11/2011 12:46 - China

Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese customs, an officer pulled us aside, removed a suspicious metal object from my boyfriend's luggage and called six other officers to have a look. It was a kinky pair of handcuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 533

You deserved it 6 384

By TheEnglishOne - 23/01/2009 00:42 - United States

Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 835

You deserved it 8 715

By Anonymous - 02/10/2009 19:30 - United States

Today, my girlfriend decided to be very naughty and placed her underwear in my backpack. I wish she had told me, because it slipped into a folder that contained my project data for my professor. So, after class, I got sent to the Dean of Students' office to talk about sexual harassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 352

You deserved it 3 310

No sex for you

By oops - 03/07/2021 13:59

Today, I gave my mom a shirt as a birthday present. Apparently, she already had the exact same shirt, so asked me for the receipt so she could return it and get a different one. When she read the receipt, she grounded me. I forgot I bought a box of condoms when I bought the shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 584

You deserved it 971

By Anonymous - 23/03/2013 15:21 - Norway - Trondheim

Today, I went to the airport after saying goodbye to my, for some reason, giggling boyfriend. I learnt why he was so cheerful when I opened my purse in front of the guards, only to find pink-furry handcuffs, and a huge dildo. They pretended not to know what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 338

You deserved it 6 823

yourlifesucksyui 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 19:06

you couldn't tell?

perdix 29

Wednesday 14 July 2010 20:02

She was probably disappointed that all you offered her were mini-condoms. Doesn't say much about what you're packing. Next time, visit Texas and bring her back some of our local condoms. You may not live up to that "everything's bigger in Texas" slogan, but it pays to advertise ;)

Comments

leslielove11 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 20:10

safe sex is good sex ;)

punjabi44 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 20:21

she might like it

x3molover 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 20:22

don't ppl check out a gift before they give it anymore? I've never just got something off the shelf, wrapped it and said "here you go (:" ppl these days..

tboudre 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 20:24

so, did that help you get laid?

kayleemay 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 20:32

how thoughful(:

BigdaddyC 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 20:48

At least you got her something she can use. Sounds thoughtful.

Silkie 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 21:05

Well let's do the math, if your grade is a 67%, and your pretty average in bed so your professor gives you a five percent grade raise for each extra credit session. You times that by two and you get your grade up to a 77%! That's a C!