Health: FitBitch

FitBitch

By Anonymous - 22/02/2015 16:09 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, my mother-in-law sent me a pedometer for my birthday. I've been confined to a wheelchair for most of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 010

You deserved it 2 156

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Same thing different taste

By TheRunaway21 - 06/04/2015 20:49 - United States

Today, my mother admitted to me that she sends me up and down the stairs to get things for her because she thinks I could use the exercise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 344

You deserved it 5 395

Casual ableism

By CrippledFatty - 01/11/2022 01:00 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was yet again chastised for using a wheelchair, since, "Obesity isn't a disability." I'm 46 with lipedema, and lost my ability to walk 13 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 138

By Crippled - 27/12/2009 05:35 - United States

Today, my parents bought me an alarm clock that runs away from you while beeping obnoxiously when you hit snooze. I just had ankle surgery and am unable to walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 658

You deserved it 2 890

By Anonymous - 07/09/2018 22:00

Today, my lazy, obese mother took the last motor cart at the grocery store. My leg is in a cast. She told me to "use the shopping cart to help with the limp" as she rolled away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 376

You deserved it 222

By bannana0zoom - 03/03/2012 08:06 - Canada

Today, it's my birthday. My mom got me a gym membership and a bunch of clothes that are a few sizes too small. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 010

You deserved it 7 973

By Anonymous - 22/08/2019 17:00 - United Kingdom - Poole

Today, I managed to break my ankle by running it over with the wheelchair I've used on a daily basis for the last 6 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 615

You deserved it 176

Weight watcher

By depressedkiwi - 15/07/2020 08:01

Today, I found out my mother-in-law is trying to force me to lose weight, even though I am trying, and have a medical condition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 395

You deserved it 665

By FootyFoot - 06/03/2012 11:50 - Australia

Today, I texted my mom if she could pick me up from the hospital. She replied "No fatty, walk home." I have a broken foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 453

You deserved it 3 221

Make the day about me!

By Anonymous - 21/08/2020 06:02 - United States - Roy

Today, at my wedding, my grandmother special requested a wheelchair, even though she doesn’t and never has needed any kind of assistance walking or standing at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 167

You deserved it 190

By Anonymous - 30/10/2009 14:23 - United States

Today, my mother sent my birthday present to me four days late. It was a handy keychain blood alcohol detector so I can make sure I'm sober before I drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 847

You deserved it 7 695

nix1993 41

Sunday 22 February 2015 21:12

For her birthday send her mens clothing, like socks, boxer shorts shirts etc. but take out the labels and make sure they wouldn't fit her husband.

vikky538 28

Sunday 22 February 2015 21:09

there's a reason people call mother-in-law a monster...

Comments

dumpless 13

Monday 23 February 2015 12:58

That's ****** up

sillygoosezeus 4

Monday 23 February 2015 13:26

#78, ya don't say.

B6LLT 14

Monday 23 February 2015 13:44

stick it on your arm, it should still work

hope0203 1

Monday 23 February 2015 14:32

Just find a way to strap it to your wheel, they monitor up and down movements so every time your wheel spins it should connect to it!

simsgirlgem 25

Monday 23 February 2015 18:19

either she's going senile or she's a bitchzilla

copydude 7

Monday 23 February 2015 18:29

give it back to her and tell her you need an odometer ;)

KVYLV 16

Monday 23 February 2015 18:59

I'm hopeful that Your Monster-In-Law maybe has a cruel sense of humor.

l2f6311 4

Monday 23 February 2015 19:12

You should send her a scale for her birthday.

JKPwnage 27

Monday 23 February 2015 19:21

There's a reason that "MOTHER IN LAW" is an anagram for "WOMAN HITLER"

fabcade 14

Monday 23 February 2015 19:25

I'm curious to what your husband had to say. I surely hope he defended your honor.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, after years of loaning my mother countless amounts of cash that never get paid back, borrowing $60 from her, and being just one day late paying it off due to food poisoning, she sends a very large man to my door to collect, like she's Tony Soprano. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 481

You deserved it 4 934

Today, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this new guy I'm seeing. I was telling her all sorts of raunchy sex things we've done until someone taps my shoulder and says "I'm sure he doesn't appreciate you saying this in public." It was his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 353

You deserved it 107 021

The Top

Today, my mom came over to visit and permed my hair. Ten minutes after she started, I told her it was burning. She told me to suck it up because it doesn't hurt that badly. I now have scabs all over my scalp, hairline, and nape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 074

You deserved it 3 721

Today, working as a CNA, my nurse convinced me that in order to collect a stool sample, you had to have the patient take a dump in your hand. I only found out he was kidding after I collected the sample. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 988

You deserved it 5 042

Today, I woke to find my boyfriend of 2 years gone. I saw my little sister's talking bear at the bottom of my bed, it said "squeeze me" so I squeezed it and it said "it's over." It was my boyfriends voice. I was dumped by a talking bear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 204

You deserved it 4 907

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school. They found her on the roof, threatening to kill herself. I had to pretend to sound scared and sad over the phone, but in reality, the only emotion I could feel was extreme joy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 247

You deserved it 1 758

Today, my dad gave me a speech about being gay. He said he'll accept me if that's who I truly am, but he wants me to think it over first. I'm an actor in a play. I had to explain the concept of wearing costumes and acting like someone else to him. For the third time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 070

You deserved it 4 238

Today, my boyfriend told me that we wouldn't move in together as we had planned to do for a long time. His mother forbade it. He is 27. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 157

You deserved it 3 061