Communication

By ohyaknow - 30/09/2010 09:56 - United States

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend asked me if I have ever or would ever fake an orgasm. I assured him that I wouldn't, when he has actually never given me one. I didn't have the heart to tell him. FML
I agree, your life sucks 13 000
You deserved it 37 654

Same thing different taste

Top comments

well that's just too bad. man up and tell him so he can maybe work on giving you one!

perdix 29

That is a question no man should ever ask -- there is only one answer that will always be given. As far as we are concerned, it doesn't matter to us whether your orgasms are real or not, they are just signals that we are doing it right. If you are faking, you are just screwing yourself (figuratively) because you are letting him get away with inadequate performance. If you lay there quietly as he pumps away, he might get the hint that he has work to do down there with his fingers and his tongue.

Comments

agreed. plus he won't get better if u don't say anything.

u need to be more involved in communicating with him as he is honestly concerned about ur needs. I agree with every person who posted, if u don't come clean with him asap u will regret it. What happened to trust ad honesty in a relationship?

But you had to preface it with two words. I find that confusing...

#128 There really shouldn't be anything confusing about that.

a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do. but u should have told him. maybe it would have gotten better. maybe you could show him.

wow, so your answer to this problem is to lie about it? nothing good ever became of a lie. you need to fix this or get out....a relationship built on lies isnt worth anything.

1121osu2110 0

wow! more people on here besides myself also believe that a female having an "o" just by vaginal intercouse.... hmmm what does that mean... oh yea I was right you dumb ass....

god damn ur a bitch. I know it's in ur nature but don't u think u could at least TRY to hold back a little. also i hope u are one of the gays that can still actually raise a child that turns out normal

emb1990 0

Not everyone can ****** during sex. not telling your partner can actually be more beneficial to the relationship in some cases. Just because there is no ****** doesn't mean that the sex wasn't enjoyable. Besides, with most guys you could give step by step instructions and a diagram and they are still going to do what they want regardless as to if you like it or not.

glitchedgamer 0

For the last time, it's not the guy's responsibility to give you an ******. He helps it along, but it's mostly YOU who needs to make yourself as aroused as possible. It's the same with guys too.

Personally, I don't think there's anything wrong with faking it-- occasionally, and only when you otherwise have a quite mutually fulfilling sex life. Sometimes you just can't get there, and when that happens, the pressure (teehee) can build and affect your partner adversely, especially if you usually have one. Then "getting there" becomes a chore for both of you, and that rather defeats the purpose. An ****** is always a good thing, but you can still enjoy sex without having one. I'd rather my partner live in blissful ignorance once in a blue moon than feel guilty or bad about himself afterward. Of course, this OP's situation is quite different, and I'm inclined to vote YDI for the reasons already stated: lack of communication, relying only on one's partner for gratification, deceit, etc. She's shot herself in the foot now; she'll have to backtrace, or consequences will never be the same.

Ah I'm so on the fence about your statement. On one hand I agree that you can really put some one over the top by being into it, but on the other hand, they could be crushed if they found out. It sounds like this is something that should be negotiated before hand. "Is it ok if I act more into it than I am so that you'll like it better?". Seems reasonable.

hit4prez 0

But to be fair you could tell your partner that this is just one time it ain't going to happen so he does not have to keep trying to get you to finish, just say not happening tonight, and let him get his happiness, works with mr and my gf all the time we got great communication :)

I'm following you, IrishJane, but still, I'm wondering why you should ever fake. It is very, very, very rare for me to don't ******, but if I'm feeling that it's not going to happen, how great the sex might be, well, than I just say it. "Darling, I am really enjoying it and it is fantastic, but I don't think I'm going to come, sorry, I hope you don't mind.", or things like that. Than he will try even harder, but that's not what I wanted to say. I mean, it shouldn't hurt his ego. I have never faked. Maybe just because I'm too lasy. But still, I'm proud of it.