Health, Vacation and Diets: Calories for days

Calories for days

By Anonymous - 31/07/2023 18:00

Today, I've been trying to make the most out of my short vacation by dieting, by eating a big pot of yogurt with lots of fresh fruit every day. Turns out what I thought was yogurt is actually heavy cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 194

You deserved it 1 002

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Same thing different taste

By bummed - 10/01/2010 05:35 - United States

Today, I finished up a week of this new "Liquid Foods" diet I learned about from a friend. After a week of denying myself of my favorite foods and eating only non-fat yoghurt and smoothies, I have not only gained 2 pounds, but have diarrhea. Just in time for my anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 425

You deserved it 31 748

By Anonymous - 15/06/2010 19:31 - United States

Today, I finally weighed myself after going on a strict diet of only fruits, vegetables, and coffee. I gained weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 177

You deserved it 22 458

By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 14:48 - United States

Today, I decided I would eat healthy in order to lose weight. Feeling powerful, I threw away all of the icecream in my freezer. An hour later, I picked the icecream carton out of the garbage and ate the entire half-melted carton. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 418

You deserved it 119 157

By nick - 12/05/2010 09:49 - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to go on a diet to lose some weight before summer. This was followed by the arrival of a giant parcel full of candy from my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 267

You deserved it 5 989

How's the diet going?

By Anonymous - 04/08/2020 20:01

Today, I bought 3 buckets of expensive low-calorie ice cream because it was on sale, only to discover it tastes rather awful. I thought I liked that stuff… Oh, I remember now, I did like it… After mixing it with lots of chocolate spread. FML

I agree, your life sucks 614

You deserved it 1 223

By Fattymuch - 14/09/2011 14:27 - India

Today, I was online looking up ways to lose weight, get thinner and be healthier, all the while eating a slab of brownie that was half the size of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 961

You deserved it 51 973

Does this smell weird?

By Anonymous - 13/11/2020 15:05 - Hong Kong - Central District

Today, I found out that the shampoo I’ve been using has yogurt in, following a prank my boyfriend did. Turns out he forgot about it and I’ve been using it for 5 days now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 851

You deserved it 121

Care and sympathy

By Anonymous - 14/06/2021 12:01 - United States

Today, after taking vacation time to visit her, my mom told me she was glad I was leaving so she could get back to her diet. I'm prediabetic and have been trying to manage the condition. She ordered dessert at every meal and was the only one in the family who did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 872

You deserved it 91

By anonymous - 08/10/2011 20:40 - United States

Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 554

You deserved it 17 490

By Glutton - 28/01/2010 01:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I started our diet. After a long day of being held accountable for every calorie I ate, I went home to sneak a snack. My boyfriend came over to surprise me, and found me on the couch shoveling left-over Indian food into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 258

You deserved it 49 592

BurnInDemonFire 33

Monday 31 July 2023 20:02

So I'm guessing the product you thought was yogurt was labelled in a language you don't understand. That, or you can't read at all.

SatanicPanic 9

Monday 31 July 2023 23:12

Didn’t the consistency throw you off?

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 33

Monday 31 July 2023 20:02

So I'm guessing the product you thought was yogurt was labelled in a language you don't understand. That, or you can't read at all.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 31 July 2023 20:32

Didn't it taste suspiciously good?

SatanicPanic 9

Monday 31 July 2023 23:12

Didn’t the consistency throw you off?

Crowned Sataness 12

Tuesday 1 August 2023 4:42

how the hell did you not taste the difference?! they're not even close to the same

Yudith 24

Wednesday 2 August 2023 23:25

Heavy cream, Astro brand Greek yogurt with 11% fat, same difference.

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