About Neonoodle Not specified
Neonoodle - Followers
Neonoodle - Followed
Neonoodle's FML badges
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
    100%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    1%
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
    2,600%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    31%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    11%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    5%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    1%
The list of badges to find
Neonoodle's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

By Noname - / Friday 6 March 2009 19:04 / United States

Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything I replied "guess". He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently I've been bitchy. FML

By tamp - / Monday 22 June 2009 07:47 / United States

Today, I was helping a couple come up with a name for the baby they just had. I suggested "Joshua" thinking that it was an okay name. All sudden, the room got quiet. Turns out I had forgotten that Joshua was the name of their 3 year old son who had died a couple months before. FML

By 8reth72 - / Thursday 11 June 2009 14:17 / United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

By eeh - / Thursday 7 May 2009 14:45 / United States

Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML

By pissedoffandon - / Wednesday 6 May 2009 14:07 / United Kingdom