About Khildebrand2294
I'm happily engaged and on my way with my life what with going to college for a degree in biology so i can pursue a career in marine biology because i love sharks and want for the public to understand how misunderstood they truly are as a species and that Hollywood over-exaggerates for monetary gain and that they aren't "mindless man-eaters." If you want what one of those would be, I think that best defines any ex-wife... :P But i also enjoy playing and making music. I play the guitar (all forms), piano, keyboard, drums and bass guitar. I write blues, metal, rock, and now dubstep which can be listened to on my soundcloud page at http://soundcloud.com/Kranex
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Khildebrand2294's favorite FMLs

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

By identitychangeplease / Wednesday 19 September 2012 20:41 / Sweden - Nyn?shamn

Today, I was at Starbucks after having a rough day. The old man beside me was talking to his friend. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him point at me and say, "See that beautiful girl over there?" Flattered, I listened closer, until he finished his statement with, "She's gonna die." FML

By scared to leave the house - / Monday 20 August 2012 09:14 / Canada - Williams Lake

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

By Anonymous - / Saturday 11 August 2012 22:22 / Canada - Airdrie

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML

By Anonymous / Monday 29 October 2012 05:46 / United States

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

By thebeachisthatway - / Monday 22 October 2012 18:56 / United States - Worcester