About Cb1002630
Bachelor of Biology. I absolutely love The Office and can quote vast amounts of epicness on command.
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Cb1002630's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the airport to catch a plane. It was very crowded at the gate and there was nowhere to sit except for a flat metal bench, so I sat on that. Turns out I was sitting on a luggage scale, so my weight was displayed for everybody to see. FML

By Anonymous - / Tuesday 21 July 2009 06:06 / United States

Today, I came home after working overtime to find my dog whining and giving me her "I need to take a shit" face. After changing my shoes, I came back ready to let her out, only to find her giving me the "I just took a shit on your rug" face. My husband has been home all day. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 11 April 2013 19:38 / United Kingdom - Bridgnorth

Today, my racist, homophobic, generally degenerate grandmother visited. Within 20 minutes, she uttered multiple racial slurs, said Robert Downey Jr. will burn in hell for playing a black man in one of his movies, and yelled that she'd "whip the piss" out of me, after I asked her to leave. FML

By no tea parties here, gran - / Thursday 11 April 2013 17:16 / United States

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 11 April 2013 15:42 / United States

Today, I took multiple pictures of my blanket and pillow pet, trying to get the "perfect pose" so I could post it on Facebook with a cheesy joke. I'm 30. FML

By kimhinesvoinea / Sunday 7 April 2013 12:07 / United States