SeasonedLemur

163

2647

Appleby-In-Westmorland, England
34
Tuesday 03 September 1991

Seasonedlemur

I eat doritos and play xbox all day everyday! Waste your life with me! GT: SeasonedLemur Oh and I know I\\\'m a complete fucking idiot I don\\\'t need to be told! Happy Days!

Seasonedlemur -

Seasonedlemur

lovers5201

Gagaaaaaaa...

Kill Me Pl...

ajk168

2simz

weedle99

bandaidsta...

Tractor_Ba...

aiw14

swampbaby9...

anythingra...

ZelmaSlaye...

Seasonedlemur

mehdi - 13/10/2008 08:20

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

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Told_You_So - 09/07/2009 06:33 - United States

Today, I was in the car with my mom and dad. My mom turned around and asked, "Have you had sex yet?" I said no, which is true. My dad cracked up and said, "Told you so!" My mom frowned, took out her wallet, and handed him $20. My parents bet on my nonexistent sex life. FML

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campmom - 08/07/2009 05:02

Today, my nine year old son went around telling everyone that me and my husband had a "foursome" last month. It turns out that some douchebag counselor at the camp he goes to thought it would be funny to tell him that a foursome was a divorce. All of his friend's parents think we're kinky freaks. FML

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AidenFromSweden - 06/07/2009 18:41 - Sweden

Today, I come home to find my nephew holding pieces of my new $3,500 Sony Video Camera. He told me he threw it out the window because it was a portal for aliens. FML

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BigBallah93 - 05/07/2009 15:23 - China

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house for dinner. Her mom gave me some seasoned cauliflower, which I didn't like. Not wanting to dissapoint my girlfriend's mom, I slipped the cauliflower of my plate and gave it to their dog. It turns out cauliflower gives their dog explosive diarrhea. FML

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