porcelainvains

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Backwoods, 'Murica
29 years-old
Sunday 16 June 1996
couple

A propos de Porcelainvains

And so, it's come to this.

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Fucked!

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Porcelainvains's favorite FMLs

Cursed

By Anonymous - 02/10/2010 13:12 - Australia

Today, I was at the beach with my parents. They were walking hand in hand, when they spotted a crab. My Dad turned to my Mum and said, "Oh, must've crawled out of my pubes!" they both laughed and kissed. I don't think they realized I was within hearing distance. FML

agreeclassic 35 960

vote type 1 3 870

By Anonymous - 18/10/2013 17:30 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

agreeclassic 30 416

vote type 1 44 273

Noise complaint

By no sleep for me - 08/01/2013 07:44

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

agreeclassic 41 418

vote type 1 5 739

Creepy

By Anonymous - 17/10/2017 06:00 - United States

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

agreeclassic 41 103

vote type 1 5 365

By Anonymous - 27/11/2011 11:46 - Denmark

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

agreeclassic 43 408

vote type 1 3 598