thekidracb

Mr Rancho Cucamonga, USA 41 years-old In a relationship

killmenow 10 September 2012, 17:52 Seattle, United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

231 comments

Anonymous 6 October 2013, 21:49 Toronto, Canada

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

156 comments

Anonymous 11 January 2014, 02:25 United States

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

95 comments