Emmiegirl6

Miss Puyallup, Washington 31 years-old It's complicated

Anonymous 7 May 2012, 23:52 Yucaipa, United States

Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML

142 comments

Anonymous 8 May 2012, 02:52 United States

Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

108 comments

Mouhahaa 9 May 2012, 03:48 France

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

180 comments

Anonymous 5 July 2012, 19:10 Findlay, United States

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a Diet Coke?" FML

265 comments