Steve Knight

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Steve knight's favorite FMLs

Gullible

By Anonymous - 07/02/2022 11:59

Today, I caught my 12 year-old seconds away from dripping bleach in his eye. Apparently “someone online” told him it scars the pupil red permanently, like a devil's eye, and he believed them. I’m shutting off the internet permanently, I can't handle his level of stupidity anymore. FML

agreeclassic 1 211

vote type 1 195

By RachelDC - 03/07/2009 19:06 - United States

Today, I noticed a string was following behind our family cat. After close inspection I realized it was a plastic kite string he partially digested. I had to pull the other three feet of plastic kite tail from his rectum. He purred the entire time. FML

agreeclassic 75 189

vote type 1 5 664

By Anonymous - 04/01/2016 15:14 - United States - Dalton

Today, this beautiful girl that I've known for a long time told me that she just can't date me anymore because I remind her too much of her cat. FML

agreeclassic 22 440

vote type 1 1 915

By Anonymous - 07/11/2009 08:04 - United States

Today, I got a new job. I'm 26 and I left an amazing job to move back to be around my family. I have no choice but to take this job. I will be placing my finger in a dead turkeys ass, cutting open its stomach, and ripping out its guts. 15 per minute. FML

agreeclassic 32 123

vote type 1 10 786

By sleep - 12/10/2018 04:22

Today, I had a physics test and was feeling tired, so I tried drinking coffee before. I then became so tired that I fell asleep while in the middle of taking my test. FML

agreeclassic 51

vote type 1 7