pineapplefiend

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Pineapplefiend's favorite FMLs

Liability

By Josh - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out the reason why my therapist was so nice to me all of the time. Apparently, she is afraid that I'm going to stab her if she pisses me off. FML

agreeclassic 29 738

vote type 1 5 963

WHO ARE YOU?

By Targeted - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Kirkland

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

agreeclassic 34 210

vote type 1 2 903

By what the fuck, mate - 30/09/2012 19:00 - Australia

Today, I started working my crappy, minimum-wage retail job at a local electronics store. An hour into my shift, my boss sent me to scrub out a discount bin, after some drunk cunt in his teens staggered into the place yelling, and puked his guts into it. What a life. FML

agreeclassic 21 466

vote type 1 2 575

By Anna - 28/03/2012 01:08 - United States

Today, it's my twenty first birthday. My biggest birthday surprise was discovering that I'm alcohol intolerant, by vomiting my first beer all over my boyfriend's mother. FML

agreeclassic 27 751

vote type 1 4 669

By takhay - 28/03/2012 00:37 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I slipped in a pile of vomit someone left for me on the train platform on the way to work, spraying puke all over both of my legs. It's only 6:30am. It's going to be a long day. FML

agreeclassic 25 546

vote type 1 2 094

takhay app_comment_confession_title

takhay 7

Wednesday 28 March 2012 16:52

I actually told a few people at the same time, and they all backed away simultaneously...