Toronto, Canada 36 years-old
Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML
Today, I woke up on the top bunk of my bed with the birds chirping. I felt so energized, I gave a big stretch, and my hand hit the ceiling. I accidentally pushed the ceiling board up and lots of tiny spiders fell on me and my bed. FML
Today, I was taking my earrings out and thought I had lost the back of one. Turns out my ear infection has caused the flesh of my ear to grow around and engulf the back of my earring and it is still stuck in there. FML
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me because his iPod app said I was cheating. FML
Today, I watched my grandfather try and park his car inside the storage area for shopping carts, thinking it was a parking space. FML
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