COOL__Coal

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Cool__coal's favorite FMLs

In case you haven’t noticed, I'm weird. I’m a weirdo. I don't fit in

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Conover

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better I said that she looked small. She said, "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

agreeclassic 18 131

vote type 1 40 969

By anonymous - 22/12/2012 12:50 - Australia - Newcastle

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She pretended not to hear me. FML

agreeclassic 55 803

vote type 1 4 995

By fucking fuck it fucking hurts - 21/12/2012 22:41 - United States

Today, after nearly a week of awful pain in my right lung, I finally went to see a doctor about it. When I mentioned my history of lung problems and suggested it could be pneumonia, he told me to "leave the diagnosing to the professionals" and ended up claiming I have acid reflux. FML

agreeclassic 28 647

vote type 1 6 194

Not a history major

By surrounded by dumbfucks - 13/12/2012 23:44 - United States - Carmel

Today, in history class, we were talking about Ancient Rome, and what childbirth would have been like back then. One girl asked in all seriousness why they didn't use ultrasound machines to see what sex their babies were. I have to deal with people like this on a daily basis. FML

agreeclassic 33 017

vote type 1 2 159

Help!

By Anonymous - 25/11/2012 06:56 - United States

Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML

agreeclassic 22 423

vote type 1 8 104