shotti01221996

Today, I had to moisturise my dog's testicles because they got sunburnt. FML

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me by finding orange panties in my closet. His excuse was "they're a Christmas gift." Thanks honey, I get panties that won't fit, and have little brown streaks. FML

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

Bruh…

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that fist pumping during sex is not romantic. FML