Weekend_Hero

Anonymous This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff United States

Running late

Today, I woke up very excited because I was going on my first date with this guy I really liked. I dressed very nicely and went to where we were supposed to meet. I waited for about 2 hours. I called him to ask him where he was. He got angry because he was still sleeping and I woke him up. FML

74 comments

gorillalove 11 September 2010, 19:25 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

336 comments

Anonymous 5 October 2010, 00:47 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML

234 comments

Anonymous 25 October 2010, 07:21 Australia

Today, I was on MSN when the conversation died. So I lied and told them I had to go get ready for a party, and that everyone was expecting me there. I spent the rest of the night playing The Sims. FML

134 comments