Today, I locked myself in the bathroom and started spanking the ferret. I started to get really into it when my dad started pounding on the door and yelled, "Son, that's great staying power, but can you finish up already?" FML
tazz602
Mr Phoenix, USA 63 years-old
Anonymous
Saudi Arabia 🌶️ Spicy
Anonymous
United States
Today, my fiancé nervously sat me down for a "serious chat". The chat wound up with him asking if we could postpone our wedding, because his World of Warcraft guild had a raid scheduled for the same day. FML
Z3R0G5
Indianapolis, United States
Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML