amanduhmor87

Miss Bloomington, USA 39 years-old In a relationship

Anonymous 10 September 2011, 05:57 United States

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

130 comments

IbetIgotAIDS 12 September 2011, 16:15 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

432 comments

unicorn 13 September 2011, 21:21 United States

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

212 comments