Today, my roommate is being evicted. Since we had some very good memories together, I was sad to come home and see all of her stuff gone...and half of my stuff, too. FML
Today, I learned that marriage isn't all roses and sunshine. Instead, it's digging an infected ingrown hair out of your husband's ass cheek because he can't reach it himself. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I told my boyfriend I wanted to feel special even if for just one day. He said he would do the laundry for me. FML
Today, my dog ate my underwear. This is the twenty-seventh pair that he has eaten. FML
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