Mr San Francisco, USA 35 years-old Single
Today, I discovered my parents have spent my college fund because "2012 will happen" before I graduate. FML
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
Today, my boss fired me by locking me out of my workplace after I went out to throw out the trash. FML
Today, I went to a job interview. It would have been fine if I had remembered it was over the phone, and not in person. I drove two hours. FML
Today, I went to the airport a full three hours before my flight departure time just to be on the safe side. I ended up having the best nap of my life and missing my flight. FML
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