The Top · The all-time greatest FMLs

Anonymous · 24 September 2025, 00:00

Giant

Today, I saw a guy struggling to reach something on the top shelf at the grocery store. Wanting to be helpful, I said, “Need a tall person’s help?” He laughed, stepped aside, then his girlfriend, who was taller than both of us, grabbed the item with zero effort. She gave me the dirtiest look, as if I’d personally insulted his manhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 197 You deserved it 360

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 20 April 2023, 15:00

Anon struggles

Today, I realized I shouldn't have confessed anonymously to my long time crush through an anonymous account. I was so happy that they noticed me a little and made posts that seems directed to me, but then they just stopped. I'm so sad and craving their attention that I'm getting upset when I shouldn't be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 197 You deserved it 937

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 25 December 2023, 06:00 ·Netherlands

Dishes, now!

Today, I went out to eat with a friend. I was supposed to be paying, but when I tried to, there wasn't enough money in my bank account. She didn't have money with her either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 197 You deserved it 745

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 8 June 2022, 00:01 ·United States

Drowning

Today, my son finally revealed the reason he was always blasting music as a teenager was to drown out the sound of his father and I arguing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 1 641

4 comments Share

Rebecca197 · 21 September 2022, 13:30

Gullible's travels

Today, without trying, I convinced my 24 year-old daughter that Stop signs with a white border around it were optional. Her car is now totaled and she’s in the emergency room with whiplash. I didn’t think she’d be that gullible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 2 737

17 comments Share

Anonymous · 8 February 2025, 09:00 ·Canada

Risky move

Today, I sent a risky text to my crush and immediately put my phone on airplane mode so I wouldn’t spend the next hour anticipating and responding to his reply. I forgot I did this and spent the whole day thinking he was ignoring me, but when I switched it back on, I'd not received a single message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 509

0 comment Share

Anonymous · 1 November 2026, 22:00 ·Rochester, United States

Trimmer

Today, my husband looked at me and said, "Baby, you're growing a mustache. You want me to edge it up?" No, I don't have that much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 66

0 comment Share

John · 26 October 2026, 22:00 ·Poland 🌶️ Spicy

And the boner?

Today, I've been blessed with a great girlfriend who initiates sex often, but then during the act just lays there looking uninterested while I do all the work. Looking at her bored expression makes me lose all the fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 80

1 comment Share

Anonymous · 5 November 2026, 12:00 ·Roscommon, Ireland

Overacheiver!

Today, I'm a third-year college student. Between classes Monday-Thursday and a part-time job from Friday-Sunday, checking my work schedule for November has revealed that I do not have ONE SINGLE DAY OFF IN NOVEMBER. Literally in classes 4 days a week, working the other 3. I'm actually going to die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 79

0 comment Share

Anonymous · 13 February 2024, 20:00 ·United States

Work it

Today, I was excited about my new fitness tracker that I decided to go for a run to test it out. Midway through, I looked down and realized I'd forgot to turn it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 460

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 1 September 2024, 06:00 ·Santa Fe, United States

The jug of shame

Today, I had a Zoom meeting. I tried being professional by setting a virtual office background, but during the meeting my computer glitched and revealed my real background: a pile of dirty laundry and a jug of Arizona Tea. My boss couldn’t stop laughing because he thought the jug was a jug of piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 449

0 comment Share

Anonymous · 20 August 2022, 18:00

Avoidance

Today, I avoided planning an event for three years. I was saved by COVID in 2021, and 2020. It's now supposed to be happening next week, and I haven’t done anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 1 370

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 8 August 2024, 00:00 ·Milwaukee, United States

Stinky

Today, I went to work at my new job after taking a shower but I'd forgotten to put on deodorant. I started getting strange looks and wondered why, only to find out later that everyone was talking about me, including someone I have a crush on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 370

0 comment Share

alannj03 · 3 September 2025, 03:00 ·United States

"Probably"?

Today, I'm considering faking my death in order to get out of my relationship. My girlfriend got in a car accident that left her disfigured, and I no longer find her attractive. I met someone at work who's a better fit for me. I know I'm probably an asswipe, but is it wrong to want a partner whom I'm attracted to? FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 994

12 comments Share

PaulineB · 12 October 2024, 16:00 ·Luton, United Kingdom

Slipped my mind

Today, I was complaining to my best friend about my weird cousin and how annoying he is whenever I see him (which isn't often, thankfully). She replied, “Isn’t that my boyfriend you're talking about?” Turns out, yes. Yes, he is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 410

2 comments Share

IKEA SUCKS · 22 November 2023, 16:00

Step by step

Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that boasted "easy, step-by-step instructions." Three hours later, surrounded by mismatched screws and a confusing diagram, I realized the only thing "easy" about it was my decision to ask my dad to come round and assemble it for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 You deserved it 430

1 comment Share

Anonymous · 25 October 2020, 02:02 ·Tampa, United States

PSA

Today, I just spent 3 hours at work reading FML posts and giggling at my desk. For the blurred out posts, I was moving my desk chair back to read what they said while squinting. I just realized I can hover the mouse and it will be clear and not blurry anymore. Now I have a headache and got in trouble with my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 1 617

4 comments Share

Anonymous · 25 October 2025, 00:00

Dethroned short King

Today, I was on a first date. I asked her what she brought to the table since I’m a pretty well established guy. A voice in the booth behind me yelled out, “How bout a booster seat, Smurf!” Everyone laughed so hard I got up and left. I’m 5ft3 and bitches always make it about my height. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 991

8 comments Share

Mud · 11 June 2026, 00:00 ·Secaucus, United States

Grow up, man

Today, I called the guy who's been ghosting me after our date and demanded answers. He said, "All you wanted to talk about on our date was heavy shit, my career, my family, my past relationships. It didn't feel like a date, it felt like an interview." Of course! I wanted to know if our goals match! I'm 35, not a teen! FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 744

6 comments Share

Anonymous · 3 January 2025, 20:00 ·Carlsbad, United States

The struggle is real

Today, I spent 3 hours looking for a roll of tape. I didn't find the tape. I still need the tape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 344

3 comments Share

DonDonDon · 27 June 2021, 06:01 🌶️ Spicy

Caught in 4K

Today, I found out that sharing Apple ID’s with your iPhone and your wife’s iPad is a bad idea. She might receive the texts and nude pictures between you and your side chick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 7 442

15 comments Share

Anonymous · 26 May 2026, 09:00 ·Boston, United States

The economy is doing great

Today, during a work happy hour, someone complained about “people who still live with their parents after 25.” I laughed along before remembering I had taken the train there from my parents’ house because my landlord raised my rent again. To make it worse, the guy at the table later asked if anyone could spot him money for a taxi home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 223

1 comment Share

Anonymous · 28 October 2024, 15:00 ·Balwyn North, Australia 🌶️ Spicy

Satisfaction

Today, I realised that I'm addicted to a porn game… not because of the porn. The simple gameplay mechanic of combining objects on a board to make new objects makes my brain happy. I found myself feeling depressed at the thought that I'd have to wait 3 hours for my moves to recharge before I could play again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 398

3 comments Share

Mac (29m) · 27 May 2026, 20:00 ·Seattle, United States 🌶️ Spicy

Chemical balls

Today, I'm aging, so it’s clear my ball skin has got more rough, and I can't even shave anymore without bad razor burn. Well, I tried Nair for the first time. My balls are now severely chemically burned and blistered. It was just 4 minutes of Nair! I was finally getting my sex drive back after a divorce, so I was trying to be ready just in case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 298

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 4 May 2026, 03:00 ·Van Nuys, United States

Nailed that social interaction

Today, someone was making jokes and everyone started laughing, so I laughed. He then proceeded to look me dead in the eye and go, "What are you laughing at?" I started stuttering and mumbled back quietly, "I don't know, what are you laughing at?" He goes, "I'm not laughing" and then they all stared at me weird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 283

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 27 May 2025, 12:00 ·Wuhan, China

Shoot your shot

Today, I learnt through others that my crush will be emigrating to the US in a month's time. We've known each other for almost three years but I'm too afraid to say it. But then we will never cross paths again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 370

3 comments Share

here's a giant baby · 5 October 2025, 03:00 🌶️ Spicy

Confusing

Today, my boyfriend told me he was horny. Since it has been a while, I offered to help. He sighed and complained that he didn't feel attractive and didn't want sex. I laughed and asked if he grew a vagina overnight. He got mad and stomped off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 604

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 17 September 2023, 16:00

Missed the point

Today, after working all day to make a big vegan meal for my family, hoping it would get them to become vegans as well, my brother thought it appropriate to pass around a block of cheese for everyone to grate over the pasta dish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 1 853

17 comments Share

Janet is here · 3 June 2024, 12:00 ·United States

Tight fit

Today, I tried on a sweater in a store. It was a bit tight, but I managed to get it on. When I tried to take it off, it got stuck halfway. After several failed attempts, a sales associate had to help me out of it, while other customers watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 501

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 16 March 2025, 15:00 ·Romania

Keep on trucking

Today, six days before I turn 18, my mom totaled her nice BMW. She had promised it to me as a birthday present. My step-dad is giving me his old rusty truck instead, so now I can look like a hick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195 You deserved it 654

9 comments Share