Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that boasted "easy, step-by-step instructions." Three hours later, surrounded by mismatched screws and a confusing diagram, I realized the only thing "easy" about it was my decision to ask my dad to come round and assemble it for me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that claimed to be "easy to build in minutes." Four hours and multiple arguments later, I realized I had misread the instructions, and half the parts were upside down. I'm pretty sure the furniture won this round. FML
Today, I started building a basic bookshelf from a flat-pack kit without looking at the instructions, because "How hard could it be?" I finished just as the last screw went in, then noticed the back panel was facing outwards and every shelf was upside down. Taking it apart took longer than putting it together. FML
Today, halfway through assembling a toy kitchen for a birthday, I realized the instructions made no sense and half the screws looked identical. I still somehow finished it and felt triumphant until the kid opened the oven door, the whole thing tipped sideways, and I had to spend the rest of the party holding it together with one hand. FML
Today, I tried to put together some flat-pack furniture. I wound up in my underpants, screaming stuff like, "Fuck you, fucking Ikea bastard" at pieces of confusing plywood. FML
Today, I spent two hours building an IKEA bookshelf. When I was finished, I realized it was inside-out. There was no way to fix it without completely taking it apart again. FML
Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML
Today, my wife texted me, saying an expensive piece of furniture had been delivered. I specifically said, "Wait until I get home and we'll put it together." An hour later, she opened it and broke it beyond repair while trying to assemble it herself. FML
Today, I spent hours assembling a bookshelf I'd bought online. Once it was finally done, I realized I’d put the back panel on backwards, so now there’s a "Made in China" label facing the room. FML
Today, I bought a flatpack, easy to assemble cot-bed for my baby. I spent 5 hours building it, but when it was done, I realised I couldn't reach into it because I'm 5ft and my arms can't reach and lift the baby. I'd have to throw him in. I'm suffering from back spasms as a result, and I now need to disassemble and return it. FML
Today, I was trying to put some new curtains up. I couldn't make sense of the instructions, so I decided to wing it. I spent a frustrating half hour fighting with it, and just seconds after I succeeded, the curtain rod gave way and slammed straight onto my head. FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
I was fortunate to have spent a lot of time with my carpenter grandfather and my repairman father and learned to build and put things together. But not everyone has that background or aptitude… I am reminded of my Dad watching me nail something together and remarking that he had never been able to make a nail go in straight. I explained that Grandaddy (his Dad) taught me how. Dad said that he had tried to teach him but it just didn’t take. Even when taught, not everyone has the same skills and abilities… OP, you can either try to learn how to put things together or just accept that it’s not one of your abilities. You won’t really know which is the case until you try to learn.
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Chazzster 32
I was fortunate to have spent a lot of time with my carpenter grandfather and my repairman father and learned to build and put things together. But not everyone has that background or aptitude… I am reminded of my Dad watching me nail something together and remarking that he had never been able to make a nail go in straight. I explained that Grandaddy (his Dad) taught me how. Dad said that he had tried to teach him but it just didn’t take. Even when taught, not everyone has the same skills and abilities… OP, you can either try to learn how to put things together or just accept that it’s not one of your abilities. You won’t really know which is the case until you try to learn.