Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk. Almost before he could open his mouth, my mother popped her head into the room and said, "Be realistic, Dan. Who would want to sleep with that?" FML
Today, I sat my mom down to tell her I was pregnant, but before I could say anything, she started to lecture me on safe sex. I don't see this ending well. FML
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML
Today, I gave my daughter the sex talk. Barely 10 minutes later, her public Facebook status read, "My mom's a total pedo," after which she mentioned the talk. Her friend posted, "That's sexual harassment. You can sue for that." Clearly I've failed as a parent. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, my mom tried giving me the sex talk. Her version of "the talk" consisted of making me watch videos of guys jacking off and reassuring me that "it's natural." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DJisHere11 19
My face says it all.
Scorpio1691 29
I'm half wondering if she is pulling your leg, just to get a reaction.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (109)
Cazz91 21
Your daughter was either being serious or she is an expert troll. I hope she was just yanking your chain OP.
vanaathiel 13
That's a horrible way to look at it. Friends at school are generally as clueless and you at that age and the school doesn't always do the best job. It's the parent's responsibility to teach their children about sex, not the schools. It's because of that way of thinking that there are so many stupid kids out there who don't know a thing about sex or pregnancy but are doing it anyway.
kingdomgirl94 29
Yeah, cause letting a bunch of 12 year old's spread 'facts' is reliable. The school system typically doesn't talk about anything really other than abstinence, and it certainly only uses scare tactics like "you could get pregnant if you have sex" or "you could get an STD" rather than giving information on safe sex and what is a reliable form of protection and what isn't. Why would you trust strangers and kids with your teen's sexual health and well being? Make sure they're well informed by doing it yourself and help stop misinformation through kids and squeamish teachers.
Sydneyhehe 6
Looks like she figured it out on her own
AnonymousAlpaca1 18
I feel like part of the problem is that sex is a taboo subject for many people. My mom never treated it as taboo, just as a part of life. She taught me the birds and bees, the basics, the risks, the prevention methods, and the options incase I got pregnant. She also offered to get me proper protection if I divided to have sex because she wanted my to be safe about it. Now at age 18 I am still a virgin. Not because I am waiting for marriage or because I think sex is dirty, but because I don't want a baby right now and I know that this is the best way. (Also because when the opportunity presented itself I didn't have protection and refused.) I will do this with my kids in the future. Tell them that it is not taboo, that it is perfectly fine and healthy when practiced safely. I will also offer to prepare them when they are ready because I want them to be safe when the time comes. I'm not delusional, I know it will happen at some point. This was probably one of the best decisions my mom made for me and my brother because we were both fully educated.
EvilLittleMan 23
Ouch ! I feel for you OP but stand your ground and let her see her teen social life go bu-bye. The road of responsibility waits for her.
Bricktothehead 21
Another candidate for '16 and pregnant'? I hope not!
THswagPLAYA 1
no it is to get her away from her boyfriend
KrazyKatz3 26
I think there's a difference between the this is how babies are born. VS. Don't let him force you into anything