Today, my boyfriend accidentally synced his contacts to my phone. I'm not sure who I want to message first, "Amber (Big Ass)", "Kayla (Baby Girl)", or one of the other 64 with similar descriptions in parentheses. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend sent me a screenshot of his phone's contact list, to show me the adorable photo of us he'd set as my contact image. I guess he didn't realize that a contact called "Side Babe" was just barely in the screenshot too. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was in the kitchen, he got three text messages, all of which were from "Babe 2", "Babe 3", and "Babe 4". FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend, who I am still in love with, sent me a text message that said, "I miss you, baby." It turns out my name comes right after his girlfriend's name on his contact list. FML
Today, I was woken up by an overly sappy good morning text from my boyfriend, complete with kissy-face images. Before I could text him back, he sent a follow-up. "Oops. Wrong person." Wait, what? FML
Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML
Today, I was helping my boyfriend of 8 years set up his Google Mini after he complained a thousand times that it wasn't working. As I successfully set up, I got to the part where one can set up speed dial contacts and we looked for my contact on his phone. I saw my name was saved as 'Lust'. FML
Today, at 3am, my boyfriend's phone notifications kept going off. I attempted to wake him up, but he didn't budge. When I went to silence it, I saw his Ashley Madison notification, followed by Tinder, Zoosk, and Plenty of Fish. We've been monogamous over a year... or so I thought. FML
Today, I was at my friend's house celebrating his 16th birthday. I couldn't find my phone so I asked my friend's girlfriend if I could borrow her phone to see if I could hear mine ringing. I dialed my number, only to find she had my number saved in her phone as "ASS FACE #3". FML
Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Start with Amber (Big Ass). It's prison logic, you take out the biggest guy first, the rest of they'd will fear you. You put your foot up Big Ass, then Baby Girl will tremble in fear of you.
Fergus52 16
Hopefully they're just ex's that he hasn't deleted from his contacts list...? Definitely needs an explanation though.
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Comments (10)
Wadlaen 24
Well, if I was you, I'd have some questions I'd like to message my boyfriend...😉
Fergus52 16
Hopefully they're just ex's that he hasn't deleted from his contacts list...? Definitely needs an explanation though.
RichardPencil 32
Start with Amber (Big Ass). It's prison logic, you take out the biggest guy first, the rest of they'd will fear you. You put your foot up Big Ass, then Baby Girl will tremble in fear of you.
genuinegoodguy 9
You mean your ex boyfriend?
juggalo2 22
Forget the boyfriend. I'd be going for Amber and her big ass!
tounces7 28
Doesn't sound like you have a boyfriend, sounds like you're with a Player who is just pretending.
Warp1978 15
Time to hook up with Amber and baby girl and leave his ass in dust 😍
Jonkbaby 23
I'm personally interested in "Big Ass"
baby.momma2 10
update: he swears they're all old. but my 2 year old opened a snap from a girl who he has never mentioned to me who is one of his top friends with a 700+ day streak that simply said "I wish🥰" his explanation, "she's a coworker and we were talking about 401Ks"
samomaha 17
If you're still there after this explanation, I'm not sure there is anything we can do or say that would matter.
Fergus52 16
Definitely time for him to go then. Also, not sure 2yo's should be using snapchat, or any other social media for that matter.
baby.momma2 10
she was watching YouTube kids and clicked his snap notification.
Blunt w/chip on shoulder 3
what are you saved under ? if u stay u deserve it cause you tolerate it