Today, my nine year-old stepson overheard me telling my husband that I was almost out of my favorite shampoo, and since it was discontinued, I couldn't buy any more. He got in the shower and happily emptied the bottles down the drain. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while showering, I broke the cap off the shampoo. Not my shampoo, my roommate's. The $60 shampoo I swore I wouldn't touch. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend pees in the shower. This would've been OK if he was peeing into the drain. Instead, he pees on the shampoo and soap bottles. FML
Today, my shower is being renovated so I washed my hair in the kitchen sink. I put my two year-old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close. As I was rinsing out my hair, my son started playing with the light switches. He flicked the garbage disposal by accident. FML
Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML
Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML
Today, while my mother-in-law visited, I asked if she wouldn't mind watching my son for 10 minutes as I had run out of baby shampoo. I came back home to see she had shaved his head completely bald. That was his very first haircut. FML
Today, I asked my daughter to buy me two pints of milk. Apparently, the shop only had four-pints, so she got that and poured half down the drain. FML
Today, while showering, I finished off the shampoo bottle. I decided to see if I could shoot it into the trash can over the shower curtain. When I heard the successful "thunk", I got so excited I slipped and cracked my head open. FML
Today, my five-year-old son told me that I smell bad and asked me to take a shower so I wouldn't attract bugs into the house. I had just showered. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
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Top comments
hzlzkgzkgzchxuxh 3
Mayb u should discontinue his favorite snack
Thisismypchere 8
Some men just want to watch the world burn.
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Comments (259)
joe1216_fml 5
Bottles, eh? I don't think more than one means you're almost out.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
He might not have known which shampoo was her favorite and so happily emptied out every shampoo bottle in the shower. In my house there are four different shampoos and 4 conditioners in the shower because different ones work for different peoples hair.
wellthatsukx 0
...and you need to borrow shovel?
bon96 3
He is the devil!
mamacakes25 6
sleep with one eye open he's out to get you :p
aperfectxdeath 3
I guess no one bothered to think that maybe he is upset his parents split + she's trying to replace his mom.
iwadasn 33
He probably is, but it's no excuse for this kind of behavior. His dad and stepmom need to sit down and have a talk with him, so he understands that lashing out isn't the way to deal with those emotions. It sounds like they need to do some bonding as a family.
06rubiandrea_fml 5
I al sorry but that IS an excuse...he is just a child,he needs time..
xoaandbxo 3
Thats awful! I would be so sad and mad at my kid
paradiseisland01 0
I would have a serious talk to your husband, and let him straighten him .
missyfiona89 28
Hide all his favourite food in hard to reach places and place stools in hazardous areas and watch him climb.
06rubiandrea_fml 5
you are such a bitch! he is just a child...
Sniffaluffagus 0
Maybe your just a wicked stepmother and should stop being a bitch...
pigbilly 0
Well. Sounds like someone is shity stepmom