Today, my nine year-old stepson overheard me telling my husband that I was almost out of my favorite shampoo, and since it was discontinued, I couldn't buy any more. He got in the shower and happily emptied the bottles down the drain. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while showering, I broke the cap off the shampoo. Not my shampoo, my roommate's. The $60 shampoo I swore I wouldn't touch. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend pees in the shower. This would've been OK if he was peeing into the drain. Instead, he pees on the shampoo and soap bottles. FML
Today, my shower is being renovated so I washed my hair in the kitchen sink. I put my two year-old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close. As I was rinsing out my hair, my son started playing with the light switches. He flicked the garbage disposal by accident. FML
Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML
Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML
Today, while my mother-in-law visited, I asked if she wouldn't mind watching my son for 10 minutes as I had run out of baby shampoo. I came back home to see she had shaved his head completely bald. That was his very first haircut. FML
Today, I asked my daughter to buy me two pints of milk. Apparently, the shop only had four-pints, so she got that and poured half down the drain. FML
Today, while showering, I finished off the shampoo bottle. I decided to see if I could shoot it into the trash can over the shower curtain. When I heard the successful "thunk", I got so excited I slipped and cracked my head open. FML
Today, my five-year-old son told me that I smell bad and asked me to take a shower so I wouldn't attract bugs into the house. I had just showered. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
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Top comments
hzlzkgzkgzchxuxh 3
Mayb u should discontinue his favorite snack
Thisismypchere 8
Some men just want to watch the world burn.
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Comments (259)
06rubiandrea_fml 5
YDI...what have you done to the child for him to hate ou so much? You are not telling us everything OP...
ceepevoy 0
your shampoo, like poo, went down the drain.
tykiej 0
What a little asshole!
sodapopper 6
I bet he's a red head
trolodon 2
Beat him and show him his place
06rubiandrea_fml 5
You are an asshole!!
Hannahp101 6
Spank his little butt (or at least tell his father what he did and have him punish him)
Hakando 5
Sucks to be you
nomnomnom97 0
I would do that to a step parent... Ydi
StromyG2 10
Be a mature adult and pull a prank on him so profound that his under developed brain cannot even conceptualize. (insert evil laugh here)
godoftrees 0
Time for adoption