Today, my nine year-old stepson overheard me telling my husband that I was almost out of my favorite shampoo, and since it was discontinued, I couldn't buy any more. He got in the shower and happily emptied the bottles down the drain. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while showering, I broke the cap off the shampoo. Not my shampoo, my roommate's. The $60 shampoo I swore I wouldn't touch. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend pees in the shower. This would've been OK if he was peeing into the drain. Instead, he pees on the shampoo and soap bottles. FML
Today, my shower is being renovated so I washed my hair in the kitchen sink. I put my two year-old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close. As I was rinsing out my hair, my son started playing with the light switches. He flicked the garbage disposal by accident. FML
Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML
Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML
Today, while my mother-in-law visited, I asked if she wouldn't mind watching my son for 10 minutes as I had run out of baby shampoo. I came back home to see she had shaved his head completely bald. That was his very first haircut. FML
Today, I asked my daughter to buy me two pints of milk. Apparently, the shop only had four-pints, so she got that and poured half down the drain. FML
Today, while showering, I finished off the shampoo bottle. I decided to see if I could shoot it into the trash can over the shower curtain. When I heard the successful "thunk", I got so excited I slipped and cracked my head open. FML
Today, my five-year-old son told me that I smell bad and asked me to take a shower so I wouldn't attract bugs into the house. I had just showered. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
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Top comments
hzlzkgzkgzchxuxh 3
Mayb u should discontinue his favorite snack
Thisismypchere 8
Some men just want to watch the world burn.
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Comments (259)
hellonyancat 6
Children are cruel. Don't worry, he'll come around eventually. Probably. And who knows, you might find an even better shampoo now!
happle 21
Was it out of spite or did he think he was helping?
Kforest 0
you'll be okay. they only make 1,000 different types of shampoo. I guarentee there's another kind out there exactly like the one you were using.
Regmeister 10
Shouldn't have married his dad then!
mattorama 15
This is the unfortunate truth. OP isn't his mom, and the kid damn well knows it.
happle 21
The dad can punish him.
perdix 31
Just think, in a few years he'll be replenishing your shampoo bottles with his ****. They grow up so fast!
SaturnV 25
I suppose you know this from personal experience?
perdix 31
Nah, by the time I realized the prank potential of my semen, I was too old for it to be cute.
fthislyfe 22
What have you done that he hates you so much?
TheDrifter 24
His father.
pagullarka 9
It was very nice to read your info,you have a good talent but too much rage. Don't let what other people say get to you, use your pan as a sword to fight back not with anger. God be with you
arvale8802 1
What did you do to make him hate u?
xXRiah_GirlXx 9
Yeah, 9 year old boys are usually assholes. Hope you can find a new favorite shampoo. If my favorite shampoo got discontinued, I'd be royally screwed.
flmisawesome 0
Bitch don't get the real expensive kind da the middle kind works best niqqas