Today, I ran over a newspaper with the lawnmower, instantly volunteering myself to pick up confetti for hours. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML
Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weed-whacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgot that I was mowing where the dogs take dumps, I absentmindedly whacked over dog poop… which got flung into my face. FML
Today, I found the $3,200 engagement ring I dropped in my yard. I ran over it with my lawnmower. FML
Today, after spending three hours raking leaves, I went to the store to get some supplies. I came back to find my neighbor had decided to blow his leaves all over my yard. FML
Today, I ran out of breath while mowing the lawn. I was on a riding lawn mower. FML
Today, while trying to pick up dog poo, I tripped and landed in the pile. FML
Today, my neighbor waved at me while he mowing his lawn. Wanting to be friendly, I waved back. In doing so I tripped on the curb, fell onto my own trash can, and rolled halfway into the street. He didn’t stop mowing. FML
Today, my elderly neighbor used his snowblower to send all of the fallen leaves in his yard into mine, which I'd raked earlier that morning. FML
Today, while I was mowing the lawn in my backyard, I ran over a glass bottle. My legs looked like a disco ball. FML
Today, I wanted revenge on my neighbor, whose dog craps in my yard, so I spent a day at the dog park gathering up dog shit. I piled it up by the property line and ran over it with the mower, intending to spray his driveway and car with turds. Instead, it gummed up the mower. Now it stinks too bad to fix. FML
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Top comments
Intoxicunt 6
You must've had some tall grass to not notice a newspaper.
JCo352 3
I would have just sprayed it with a hose, it's biodegradable.
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Comments (140)
Intoxicunt 6
You must've had some tall grass to not notice a newspaper.
tellmeastoryplz4 0
dang that sucks but u volunteered!!!
islandjew247 0
well, it IS biodegradable :) ♥
MrSassypants 34
you could of taken the easier way out. just move from New York to Mexico and learn Spanish and become the owner of mexico... 's little corner store in a little town.
ATL_chris 6
pretend you didn't see it lmfao
HandOfClod 0
You could use a vacuum!
ROFLBERRYPIE 0
What #1 said
MrSassypants 34
23 I still say my idea is easier.
Eyeliner_fml 0
agree with number 1. #2 Fail.
tarabelle 7
lol my mom did that yesterday....but it rained so most of it is gone now
cookiemobzta 0
ydi for not having one of those lawn mowers that puts the waste in a bag
nikki908 3
Maybe the Op was using one of those huge drivable Lawn mowers. I find it super fun to lawn with that. It's hard to see some things though...
priscilla_28 5
Woow... wait, thay have lawnmowers with bags? :o Well how would I know, I don't do lawns... no offense :)
mrteacup 0
not really an fml
sports_chika 0
you should always clear the yard before you mowe the lawn...duh
amc813 0
i agree with #1 how did u not see it
Waffcakes 0
you couldve vacuumed the grass (:
the_pan1c 5
vacuum it or use a leaf blower retard
Dr_Pepper_fml 3
Um, really, who the **** would vacuum their front yard?! On a different note, I house sat for my boss for a week and their asshole dog would, EVERY single morning, tear up the newspaper if I didn't get up at 7am and wait for the paper boy to come around. I feel your pain.
priscilla_28 5
I would definitely use a vacuum, makes for an interesting scene. :)
SqueakyBootz 0
omigish..! Nothing a little lint roller cant solve.
priscilla_28 5
"Howdy neighbor..." "Hey doug!" "Uhhh what are you doing there Big D?" "Ohh you know, just vacuuming the front lawn... how's little sally doing? I heard she ran into quite some trouble at school." :)
CoolAsian 0
1-uhm your ugly and you have a big ass nose O_O I'm sorry just had to say that.
ibanez370 0
61 that was kinda mean ;/ i think shes really pretty!
Intoxicunt 6
CoolAsian Stop ******* following me, you goddamn piece of gutterscum. You comment on nearly every comment of mine insulting me. It's not my fault your parents didn't want you. Get a ******* life, you annoying stalker. I hope someone hits you with a bus. That is all.
EddieYoung1991 0
balls and *******
sabatical 0
clean it up to madonnas celebration song
callmelishaful 0
not really a fml; you'll get over it :)
tomtm7 0
dont have so much fun mowing the lawn next time
beastmcbeastly 0
u shouldve used a dust buster
gtdoll 0
Agree with Intoxicunt.... on the bright side: Confetti :D!
squirell_AIDS69 0
use a rake to clean it up
amerrah 4
shoulda got a vacuum
fmlstarperson 0
exactly what i was ****** thinking
BabyDacey 0
yay partyyyyyyy :D
Rhanno 0
hahaha I agree. OP u might as well put them in a bag and use it as party decorations. just think outside the box haha no i'm jk dnt
keenan61194 4
just rake it up
OhWowFYLindeed 0
I'd be way too lazy to pick that up... :/
lolfylanydi 0
just get a leaf blower and pretend it never happend
czarofandronia 0
did u get it on video? lol that must have looked cool xD
immazombeastxD 0
don't lawnmowers suck up the grass and or newspaper? or you could just soak your lawn and dissolve the newspaper... YDI for probably a good reason I can't think of
immazombeastxD 0
haha no, he could sweep the grass
writergirl69 0
it's called a rake
jordpears 0
lol first xD
islandjew247 0
not. :) ♥
quent10 0
lol fail
nikki908 3
I'm sorry sir, but it seems that you have failed. Get the hell out of my house...Please?
aardvarkish 17
Does it hurt that Toxic even took the to write a real comment?
Primus_fml 0
I have yet to understand why people say "first" If you are first no one cares, and if you aren't you look like an idiot.
jordpears 0
I'm so sorry I'm going to kill myself, cya :)
supergirl69_fml 0
that blows :(
Michael_92 20
Rake anybody??
Crusader0102 0
that sux. i hate it when i do that.
cupcake_whore 0
ahahaha FML!
iSitt 0
well narrated
JCo352 3
I would have just sprayed it with a hose, it's biodegradable.
justsayfuck 5
Hehe, nicely phrased:)
serj_fml 0
a lazy person always works double!!!!
SkidBarbeque 0
its called a rake
the_flirtt 0
I think confetti would be hard to pick up with a rake
illmatic2 16
A rake probably won't work. The lawn mower can sometimes pick it up though.
CrAzImArIe2012 0
okk how do you not see a newspaper laying there! #13 totally agree!:)