Today, I sneezed while getting my keys from my pocket on the way to my front door, dropped them into a storm drain, and then had to explain to my landlord that my reason for needing the spare key was "seasonal allergies." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I've been having really bad seasonal allergies. I was at work, and feeling just about to sneeze for at least a full minute, but thought I could stop it. A customer came up to me, I opened my mouth to greet her… but instead sneezed right in her face. Several seconds before my addled brain caught up. FML
Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML
Today, as I was trying to get into the grocery store, I had a sneezing fit. I've typically never had one, so I didn't really know how to handle it. This one was a new record: 11 sneezes and I hadn't had the foresight to bring tissues. FML
Today, while giving a speech at work, I started sneezing. After what seemed to be the last sneeze, I went on talking. Apparently it wasn't, and I blew out my eardrum. FML
Today, I sneezed after watching a commercial involving dust. FML
Today, I had to let my nosy landlord into my apartment to ensure I didn't have an unapproved guest over. Why? Because she overheard me sneeze, and then bless myself. FML
Today, I had an unexpected sneezing fit and drove my car through 2 trees and a fence. FML
Today, I was on my way to work. Out of nowhere, my period started. Due to allergies, I had uncontrollable sneezes. Now, I have blood all over my pants. FML
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML
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