Today, my boss yet again said she was "literally dying", after she watched a funny video online. Long story short, I'm now on her shitlist because I couldn't help but point out that she clearly wasn't dying, and that her ranting was distracting me from doing actual work. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boss suspended me for laughing too hard at my desk and causing a big scene in front of our customers. I was laughing because he'd forwarded me a hilarious email. He was practically smirking as he handed me my official warning. FML
Today, my boss told me she had a nightmare where her life depended on me, and I let her die. Now I'm ridiculously paranoid that I'm going to get fired at any second. FML
Today, at my new job at a funeral home, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't "lighten the hell up" while dealing with our grieving clients. FML
Today, my boss sent a message to a coworker saying, "We're putting all of you back on the phones because one of you can't stop watching Netflix so corporate thinks you guys don't do anything." That person was me. Everyone's pissed at me now. FML
Today, as I have lately, I’ve been feeling like my boss finds any excuse to be upset with me and tell me how I’m doing wrong, when most times it’s just so stupid there’s really no point in it. For reference, I work in long term care. I messaged her and she got upset with me because she saw my name pop up and overreacted. FML
Today, my boss bitched me out for doing some random web browsing while waiting for some documents I needed to arrive, then went back to his desk and went on Facebook, thinking I couldn't see. FML
Today, I took a video of a fellow employee doing nothing but watching YouTube videos at work. When I showed the video to my boss, hoping he'd be reprimanded, I got fired for operating video equipment on company grounds. FML
Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML
Today, I got a heads-up that my boss suffered a death in the family, but was coming into work anyway. I thought he'd be depressed, but it seems he deals with grief with anger instead. I found that out when he yelled at me, threatening to rip my spine out my ass over a typo I made in a report. FML
Today, my boss told me that people from work have been complaining about me. Apparently, I'm not doing part of their jobs for them, and the other manager sometimes does. FML
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Top comments
strokesie 23
If people knew how to language we wouldn't have this problem
pjsr 33
You could've helped it, but didn't. Now you know better than to correct the boss on non-essential matters. Use this knowledge at your next job.
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Comments (101)
odamaliekh 26
Sheldon?
blackonblight 33
I swear to Eris it makes me grind my teeth when people use "literally" when they mean "practically" I'd have done the same thing, frankly.
alexnoyle 12
Ugh, I HATE it when people do that. FIGURATIVELY PEOPLE!
rawlings123 17
Good! Hopefully she listened and we have one less idiot to deal with
jezebaal8 7
I love that "literally dying"video.. It's halarious
at0micmin3r 23
Nope nope nope. Boss is a boss and you're dumb for correcting her. Even if she is a huge dingus. :) Next time just let her be stupid on her own.
BeepBeepSwerve 9
"don't correct your boss" the OP can say what he wants, and to the people giving him a YDI,eff you
communisttaco 16
I've lost all faith in humanity.
miianah1 22
Actually, the word now has a new definition added to the dictionary: word used for emphasis. So she's correct actually.
caleb_9756 14
Heard of a figure-of-speech? Hyperbole, I believe it's called