Today, my boss yet again said she was "literally dying", after she watched a funny video online. Long story short, I'm now on her shitlist because I couldn't help but point out that she clearly wasn't dying, and that her ranting was distracting me from doing actual work. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boss suspended me for laughing too hard at my desk and causing a big scene in front of our customers. I was laughing because he'd forwarded me a hilarious email. He was practically smirking as he handed me my official warning. FML
Today, my boss told me she had a nightmare where her life depended on me, and I let her die. Now I'm ridiculously paranoid that I'm going to get fired at any second. FML
Today, at my new job at a funeral home, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't "lighten the hell up" while dealing with our grieving clients. FML
Today, my boss sent a message to a coworker saying, "We're putting all of you back on the phones because one of you can't stop watching Netflix so corporate thinks you guys don't do anything." That person was me. Everyone's pissed at me now. FML
Today, as I have lately, I’ve been feeling like my boss finds any excuse to be upset with me and tell me how I’m doing wrong, when most times it’s just so stupid there’s really no point in it. For reference, I work in long term care. I messaged her and she got upset with me because she saw my name pop up and overreacted. FML
Today, my boss bitched me out for doing some random web browsing while waiting for some documents I needed to arrive, then went back to his desk and went on Facebook, thinking I couldn't see. FML
Today, I took a video of a fellow employee doing nothing but watching YouTube videos at work. When I showed the video to my boss, hoping he'd be reprimanded, I got fired for operating video equipment on company grounds. FML
Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML
Today, I got a heads-up that my boss suffered a death in the family, but was coming into work anyway. I thought he'd be depressed, but it seems he deals with grief with anger instead. I found that out when he yelled at me, threatening to rip my spine out my ass over a typo I made in a report. FML
Today, my boss told me that people from work have been complaining about me. Apparently, I'm not doing part of their jobs for them, and the other manager sometimes does. FML
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Top comments
strokesie 23
If people knew how to language we wouldn't have this problem
pjsr 33
You could've helped it, but didn't. Now you know better than to correct the boss on non-essential matters. Use this knowledge at your next job.
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Comments (101)
Puer_in_urbe 5
Since when was it cool to be a grammar Nazi? Go **** yourself, OP.
worldclassrager 41
It looks like you need to play along
sassy2085 16
No one likes their grammar corrected especially your boss. Lesson learned.
JKPwnage 27
I'm the same way. I feel like I have to correct people or I can't get through my day. It's becoming a bit of a problem for me.
bellles 18
I feel like you deserved that one. I mean, where did you really see that going ?
GreatGeak 8
sounds like someone never learned how to suck up. quick tips. the boss is always funny. no matter how busy you are, 5 minutes for the boss won't kill you and it'll show that you realize their time is more important than yours (even if it's really not).
Michael2687 9
You are dying a little each day so you are wrong and they're right.
Mimi12589_fml 10
You're actually right ! In France there used to be a jingle for a local radio that said "hello ! Another day that brings you closer to the death ! And have a nice one" ;p
Mimi12589_fml 10
Leave that body, Robin Scherbatsky !
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Well OP, what did you expect? She is your boss and you tell her that she cannot speak proper English and that she is bothering you. Even if it is true, did you think she would high five you?
uhohjoe 5
you absolutely deserve it. not being able to stop yourself pointing out your bosses mistakes doesn't just make you rude, it makes you a self-saboteur. don't bite the hand that feeds you.