Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he started pretending he was a dog. This included barking, licking my face, and scratching his ears. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It would have been a lot sexier had our chihuahua not decided to rim his ass as he thrust into me, causing him to break out into a case of the giggles. FML
Today, I was getting a bit intimate with my boyfriend. Just when things were getting interesting, my dog managed to get into my room. He jumped on the bed and my boyfriend spent the next 20 minutes playing with the dog, while I sat next to him, half naked. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my current booty-call when he thought it would be funny to make animal sounds. He "baa-ed", "moo-ed", and "gobbled" until losing his erection from intense laughter, leaving me there very confused and unsatisfied. FML
Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML
Today, I pretended to be dead in front of my dog to see what he would do. He started to hump me, and when I tried to get up, he growled at me until I got back down on the ground to wait until he was finished. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
Today, I finally gave into a kink I wanted to try out. I asked my boyfriend to send freaky voice clips of him barking and whimpering. He actually did it, and It immediately gave me the biggest ick. I am now stuck with his horrible "sexy" barking. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said it "turns him on." FML
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Top comments
n1rvanat1zed 0
So he basically doesn't understand exactly how doggiestyle works.
littlemissdqgirl 8
Wow, your sex life must be kinky lol
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Comments (180)
Stophat 0
I'm sorry, but if I was tapping someone and they started acting like a dog, and I wasn't expecting it nor was I in to it personally... I'd probably be turned off and probably a little freaked out as well.
vjoie 0
Maybe he was trying to be Jacob Black.
Doclight_fml 0
Don't judge... there are weirder fetishes. Much weirder. MUCH.
super_sm 0
day mofo is smokng balls yo tell him to screw off and lick his own dick :P
Cherryripe25 5
I guess he humped great then ? ;)
XxMoonGirlAshomi 0
0.o awkward... u no what, sex is always awkward!!!!
bnvc 0
sounds like my ex. left his ass a month later. no break up sex, thats for sure.
ImLaauren 0
DUMP HIS NASTY FREAKY ASS!
lotrgeek 10
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...ha...ha...haa
PedoPancakes 7
He was in the mood :D