Today, I went to get food. I was late so my friend ordered for me. I took a few bites and all of a sudden it got hard to breathe. I realized it was a blueberry muffin, and I'm deathly allergic to blueberries. I looked at my friend, and she was laughing, saying she wanted to see if it was true. I just got out of the hospital. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up hungover and went to the kitchen for some food. I saw what I thought was a blueberry muffin. Halfway through eating it, I realized I couldn’t taste any blueberries, so I tried another one. I then remembered my dad telling me to throw out any old food we had. It was mould. FML
Today, to make a good impression, I brought in homemade blueberry muffins for my newish coworkers. Everyone loved them, up until the guy with a nut allergy had to be rushed to the hospital. Turns out my almond milk wasn’t as "nut-free" as I thought. Welcome to the team! FML
Today, my coworker brought chocolate muffins to work for everyone. This would have been really nice if they hadn't tasted like rotten blueberry muffins spray-painted brown. I reflexively gagged after taking a bite and coughed up a brown mush in front of her. FML
Today, I was eating a mystery flavored candy and I had an allergic reaction. Not only did I have to go to the hospital because my throat swelled up, but I still don't know what I'm allergic to. FML
Today, I had to go to the ER because of a terrible allergic reaction I had to the cookies my "friend" made for me. She assured me several times that there were no nuts in them. Turns out, she put nuts in them on purpose, to see whether or not I was really allergic. FML
Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML
Today, I went to the gym to run. I ended up at the hospital because i went into anaphylactic shock. Apparently I'm allergic to exercise now. FML
Today, there was a big cake at the office. I thought it was funny to pretend to push the cute girl in the office into it. She laughed, but then lost her balance and fell forward. Everyone saw. Turns out she’s allergic to coconut, even just the shavings on a cake, and had to go to the hospital. FML
Today, I ended up in the hospital by accidentally eating poisonous berries, from a plant that I've known since childhood to be poisonous, which I also recognized as belonging to the nightshade family. I still don’t understand what made them look tasty. Brain fart of the century, I guess. FML
Today, I experienced the most intense pain I have ever had in my life. I was eating blueberries when my sister made a comment which sent me into hysterics. The force of having a bullet-like berry violently shoot out your nostril is more painful than it sounds. FML
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Top comments
Gwyndion 9
I don't get you said your "friend" did that. Anybody who pulls something like that and almost murders you because he believes you're a liar doesn't deserve to be called a friend.
SelecaoIX 3
You should stab her and then tell her that you heard it would kill her and you wanted to see if it was true.
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Comments (306)
sportsy 7
Kick her ass
ArielTheMermaid 17
What a bad friend!!!!
iHateMyLifeFML70 2
if they where your "friend" I'm pretty sure you would be able to trust them and not have to CHECK your food . stupid people and their ignorant comments .
dhiran_singh 16
What a friend you have......
fml_mu 10
And u call that your friend? Kick his ass!!!
newburton13 26
Sue her irresponsible ass!
thatviolinplayer 0
Thats insane! She/he must have psychological issues... You should sue!
RiceChrispy03 9
Sarahhish are you the bitch who did that? If so go to hell.
kirstyannemiller 4
Wtf? Guess she doesn't realise how serious it is, next time your out push her onto the road and pull her back just in time, and see how she likes it. Ahahahhahahahahha*evil laugh*
chicagoIL 4
What a ******* asshole!