Today, I woke up to find out I'd had a wet dream last night. About someone other than my girlfriend. I don't remember anything about the dream, but my girlfriend remembers everything because apparently I talked throughout my dream, and she was right next to me listening. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was sleeping I heard my girlfriend moaning. She was seemed to be having a wet dream. She moaned more in her dream than when having sex with me. FML
Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML
Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML
Today, I had a sexual dream about my ex, and I woke up after saying his name. My boyfriend was awake, and heard all the dirty talk and me moaning my ex-boyfriend's name. FML
Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but it wasn’t actually her. What happened last night? FML
Today, I woke up for the third time in a row from a wet dream about my ex-girlfriend. I'm currently on my honeymoon. FML
Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML
Today, I woke up after a really intense wet dream. Problem is, I'd fallen asleep in the living room. My little brother saw the whole thing. Now he's going around telling family I need to get some. FML
Today, while napping on the couch, I had a very vivid dream about a girl I like. I woke up to my mother and father choking back laughter and recording me on their phones. I don't know what's worse: waking up with a boner in front of my parents or finding out I was also talking dirty in my sleep. FML
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Top comments
MissGrinch 4
-resists the urge to correct this FML-
makemeasandwich 0
well it's not really your fault, right?
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Comments (105)
TheTigerRoars 0
Well, that could be your first red flag. The next one would be if she hit you. There are hotlines to help you in this situation, OP. Get help before she hurts you. -Fluffy McTiger
morgan320 0
rejection hotline?
TheTigerRoars 0
No, abuse hotline. Cause she's on the obsession stage. -Fluffy McTiger
morgan320 0
i need a hotline for pizza, got one?
TheTigerRoars 0
Pizza Hut, Dominos? I'm more of a 'take out' kind of gal. -Fluffy McTiger
morgan320 0
i can take you if you want ;)
mrahhhhh 21
Sigmund Freud would be proud of you champ. So proud he would probably invite you to one of his cocaine parties, along with Dr. Rockzo, the rock n' roll clown and Tony Montana themselves.
ThiszMexicanLove 0
YDI for having your girlfriend over.! Thingsz like that could happen. DUURRR.
MissErikaHart 0
not typically
JillianlikesVogu 0
Really? For all you know, they live together. Not really in his control, is it?
garza559 0
its her fault! if she put out you wouldnt be having wet dreams haha
Coccinelle_fml 15
And? What was the dream about?
failblorg 0
I guess you could say you have quite an imagination... and quite a sex life, wet dreams are during dry spells AHAHAHAHAHA
kenjiisown 1
Such a cute smile. I hope that is really you. =D
schalk 12
I've been there OP - not the wet dream part though. I said something in my sleep & my ex was angry for a week. No matter how much you'll try, she'll believe your subconsciously thinking something other than what you're saying so you're screwed. Good luck buddy
kenjiisown 1
You're just a dog. What do you know?
Lacrosse00 0
of course she's gonna hold it against you. after all she eats, sleeps and ***** about you all day long. i say let it go and if she can't then show her the door.
1josiecat1 0
SPONTANEOUS ERECTION!!! ;P
mahimalil 0
boring FML !!!!! what was the dream !!!!