Today, my 18 year-old son learned that just because his girlfriend was on top doesn't mean gravity will prevent her from becoming pregnant. FML
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
Today, my youngest, the 17 year-old, told me she’s pregnant. That makes it official: despite all my warnings about safe sex, all three of my daughters got pregnant before the age of 18. FML
Today, I found out that my daughter not only has a boyfriend, but that they're trying for a baby. She's barely 15. FML
Today, not only did I find out that my 13 year-old daughter is pregnant, I found out that she did it on purpose "to prove that she’s responsible." FML
Today, I spent a good few minutes watching my wife thrash our son with a pillow because despite all our warnings to him about safe sex, he and his girlfriend are going to be parents in about 6 months, and they’re both 16. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend is on the pill, and even though my girlfriend took emergency contraception, she became pregnant days after the first time we had sex without a condom. FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter believes that all women will automatically become pregnant at some point during their lives. At least we don’t have to save for college. FML
Today, I found out a 6-month pregnant woman is claiming my boyfriend to be the father. Even though this would have been previous to our relationship, he already has two kids from getting girls pregnant in high school. I guess he didn't learn his lesson the first two times. FML
Today, my 15-year-old son told me that he and his new girlfriend are deeply in love and are meant for each other. The "girlfriend" in question? My fiancé's 12-year old daughter. FML
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Top comments
zharks1010 18
Your son is a dumbass
pokemyeyes 23
#facepalm
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Comments (191)
trucker2 33
Ok..just...maybe... He was yelling, for her to get up, and she assumed Giddy-Up...lmao
extremereviews 26
Kill it before it breads... Oh wait
Tonymac617 16
Looks like someone didn't have "the talk" with your son....
DogeDogeDoge 13
I honestly find it hard to believe that this FML is real because I've heard a joke very similar to this throughout school forever.
Manic1 13
Guess you should have had the talk with him sooner. Congrats on becoming a grandparent though
jennilm1816 9
if you had properly educated him, she might still be pregnant, but not for that stupid reason!
wordygirl 11
Wow! Next thing ya know this dufus will say if he doesn't put a diaper on the baby it won't go potty:/ These yingyangs are going to need alot of help I'm afraid.
thatsme293 28
I bet your just understood but just acted on the chance of what he wanted to hear was correct.
lia4005 17
More like F her life! She's the one impregnated by a moron...
leogachi 15
@130 She agreed to have unprotected sex, so she probably thought it was true.
writerchic85 26
Idiocracy is becoming a true story