Today, I used a public bathroom and set my motorcycle helmet on the sink while I used the urinal. The helmet rolled into the sink, under the faucet and set off the motion detector, soaking the inside. I drove 15 miles home in 30 degree weather with a wet helmet. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home, in the middle of nowhere, when I needed to poop, so I found a wooded area and did my thing. As I was climbing back up, I knocked my helmet from its perch and watched it roll right into what I’d just left. FML
Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML
Today, I got into my car to go to work and discovered that my seat, seat-belt, door, and all the electronics in the door were wet. Apparently I hadn't wound the window all the way up, and it rained last night. I'm now sitting at my desk typing this with a wet bum. FML
Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML
Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML
Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML
Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML
Today, I was on a road-trip with some of my buddies, when we stopped at a gas station. When I opened the door to their bathroom, brown water flowed out, soaking my legs up to my knees. I then spent another 2 hours in an enclosed vehicle. FML
Today, while reading in the bath, I accidentally switched the shower on. Not wanting my book to get soaked, I threw it out of the tub. When I got out of the tub later, I found it had landed squarely in the toilet. FML
Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
yous_an_idiot 0
Way to use your motorcycle in 30 degree weather.
GreenAlbatross 3
He might not have another vehicle to use. Not everyone has two vehicles to use. Good for you if you're that privileged, but he might be using a motorcycle instead of a car to lower gas and maintenance costs. Congratulations for being a single-minded dickweed.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (106)
Nic_hole 0
:/ that suxx, I'm sorry
a6910 0
just to spicy up the discussion: the motion sensors sense heat movement only. objects at a room temperature cannot set them off.
CyclonePsycho 1
Well, if that was the case, then wouldn't the helmet still be warm after being on his head? But I too don't know. Not a rocket surgeon either.
null_fml 11
I am a rocket surgeon and I confirm what #23 and #56 said.
nxtfari 5
please don't tell me you two are serious about "rockets surgeons"
klettw 0
why would you be riding a motorcycle in the cold anyways?
cjammer 0
#15 answered that in reply to #1. Scan the comments next time...it's not like that Q&A was buried.
gamingmama 0
Why are you riding a motorcycle when it's that cold out anyway?? YDI
trillian_fml 0
round things roll? who could have guessed that might happen.
nomadwtf 0
that sucks dude
DynamicDave 11
On one hand I'm inclined to say FYL, because I've had to ride with a wet helmet too and it sucks. But on the other hand, I'm wondering why you didn't either A. Set your helmet down with the opening on the counter so it wouldn't roll anywhere or B. Lock it to your bike using like a bicycle lock or something. So YDI
bartmasta 0
30 degrees is hot! isn't it winter in the US?
Gobsnoglin 0
Yes it is winter in the USA. We use the Farenheit scale, so 30 degrees is below freezing (32F). Some will say 30F is warm for this time of year in the USA, but they mean by comparison, so it is likely 0F or -10F in their area, so 30F would feel warm. In reality 30F is not warm, especially with a wet helmet on your head while moving down the road.
darkmis1 18
YDI for not thinking to dry it off while you were in the bathroom.
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
Florida native here. This must of been over the past weekend when it was in that temperature range. Not only was it colder than normal for this area, but he had a wet helmet and a windy ride (the wind was kicking all over). While yes, we may not experience blizzard-like conditions and below 10-degree weather like Canada, Alaska, or some of the other northern states, it is still a tough ride regardless who or where you are from (via #12). I feel for you, OP. We're luckily going back into warmer, beautiful weather this weekend.