Today, while looking through my son's browser history, I found a Google search for "stop looking in my history u nosey cunt". I swore last week that I don't invade his privacy, so I can't even punish him for the bad language without looking like a lying bastard. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on the phone to my boss and I mentioned about finding what he needed in the search history. Later, my dad asked what a search history is. When I explained, he went red and asked me if I could maybe delete his without reading it. Jesus Christ, Dad, use private browsing. FML
Today, my dad saw my cleared internet history and said, "You do know we can still track your history with your IP address, right?" I don’t ever look at porn or anything like that. I just don’t want other people knowing all my business all the time. FML
Today, I looked through my daughter’s search history. Did I find porn? No, worse. At the age of 17, she has been looking up the definitions of commonly used words such as ‘arbitrary,’ ‘pretentious,’ and ‘initiative.’ FML
Today, my parents scoured my browser history, certain that I have a hidden Facebook account that I'm using to get up to no good. Their reasoning was that there's no way my only friends are my relatives and that all I can post about is about the weather. FML
Today, I found out my parents have a list of everything I have ever Googled. FML
Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML
Today, I went through my 15 year old daughter's internet history. On google she searched 'Excuses to get away from your dad' and 5 other variations of the same thing. We were supposed to be having a father daughter day tomorrow. FML
Today, my dad wanted to show me a cool camera he saw on Amazon yesterday, so I let him use my laptop to find it. I realized too late that I'd forgotten to clear my browsing history. The suggested purchases section was filled with dildos and lube. He definitely noticed. FML
Today, I decided to go through my younger brother's browser history. I found out he goes regularly on PornHub. He's only 10. FML
Today, I was interviewing a cute guy for my journalism class, and he asked to borrow my laptop to check his email quickly. After the interview, I realized that the last thing I had searched for on my browser's Google box was "ingrown pubic hairs," and it was still up there. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
tompom331 19
Completely deserved it. Let him have his privacy. He's growing up. YDI.
mrsmikelowrey 15
Overly strict and invading parents make for amazing sneaks and great liars.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (158)
rbernui 9
your son is a hero
inutaru 14
Teens do need some watch.......but your kid sounds like a brat
momac86 17
Served you right. Now maybe you'll start acting like a parent and monitor and restrict his freedom better since he doesn't seem to be able to handle it himself
feeloona 18
Shame on you. FHL
live2loveurself 11
Don't betray your son's trust or invade his privacy. Your son will start to hate you.
oyeh 19
It's one thing to check occasionally with his knowledge but it's another to lie to his and saying you wouldn't do it but doing it anyway. You most certainly deserve it.
FallenMetalAngel 17
I get that you want to ensure your sons safety, my mom did the same to me, and I plan on at least making sure my future kids do not do anything harmful or illegal. I agree with you keeping tabs on him, but, you were wrong for trying to hide it when your son clearly knows you do it, just own up to it, do not punish him for calling you out, but know that now he may start deleting the history IF he is old enough to know how.
suosi 21
But u r a lying bastard
PaulieXP 16
why the hell is browser history even an issue in 2015? the kid deserves it for not knowing how to use ccleaner
justsayingbeach 15
At the end of the day he's looking for **** most probably so why do you want to know his preferences?!