Today, I drove home from work, only to find both my next-door neighbours loudly arguing in the middle of my driveway. I got out and asked them what the hell was going on, only to find out one of their inbred kids had put a brick through my back window, and each is claiming the other did it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML
Today, the only thing that managed to get me out of bed was scrambling to watch my neighbours have a screaming match in the middle of our street, about which one of their brain-dead kids spray-painted "CUNT FLAPS" and a rudimentary knob on the communal garage door. FML
Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML
Today, after 2 months of my new neighbours' kids throwing rocks at our cars, constantly swearing at us, bullying my siblings in and out of school, and vandalising our property, their mother has convinced the landlord that we're the ones out of control. FML
Today, my neighbor yelled “Fuck you!” at me through his window. My crime? Closing my front door “too loud.” This man lets his children beat on the walls and slam doors but apparently I’m the problem. FML
Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML
Today, my neighbor's sons decided it would be funny to throw rocks at my house. I went outside to scold them and saw my other neighbors gathered around, watching. They didn't stop them because they thought I wasn't home. FML
Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML
Today, my neighbors in the apartment above me yet again had a loud fight, well past midnight while I was trying to sleep. I stood on my bed and pounded on the ceiling to shut them up. And now I'll have to explain the two fist-shaped holes in the ceiling to my landlord. FML
Today, I found out that the loud noise outside my bedroom a few weeks ago was neighborhood kids throwing eggs at my window, landing on the AC. FML
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Top comments
Glitterhinoceros 14
It's YOUR driveway, run them over with your car.
thatshot808 6
If your family tree doesn't fork, then you might be a redneck
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Comments (33)
thatshot808 6
If your family tree doesn't fork, then you might be a redneck
SupahAsian 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
They're from the UK...
zombiegold 23
They could still be rednecks, though.
SupahAsian 4
Yeah, I guess that was ignorant of me.
xcarxcrashx 9
Do they call them rednecks in the uk or is there some cool English slang for it?
ComTlancy 12
In the UK, they're known as Gypsies. In Australia: Sister-*******
Justy101 23
No, in Australia they're known as bogans.
chlle_2012 0
Nah in Aussie land bogan is just a general name for doggy, good for nothing young people :/
absolutegrrr 7
I think we'd probably call them pikeys in the UK. I would anyway.
ladyLALAA 29
Doggy good for nothings hey? I disagree, a bogan is someone who drinks XXXX, lives in thongs and footy shorts. Often with names like Shazza and Bazza...
BloodyHeel 8
And has a Southern Cross tattoo, drives a ute, wears a flanny etc etc.
Glitterhinoceros 14
It's YOUR driveway, run them over with your car.
FirstTigerHobbes 13
Inbred kids these days, putting bricks through windows. Yeah, run em over
Honda288 2
And run over the little bastard that put a brick through your window.
ladyLALAA 29
Make them go halves in the cost, stupid neighbors!
Dishwad 0
AMEN!
ThatSceneKid1313 9
Those damn rednecks.
THEKAISER 4
No, that damn neighbor
Glitterhinoceros 14
15, theres no flamingos related in this FML...
meade34 2
Damn it 41. I was thinking the same thing.
absolutegrrr 7
We don't call them rednecks, but I guess we have the same 'breed' of people: gypsies, pikeys, chavs etc.
ihatethesenamez 6
Smosh :D
Ninjasaurus18 9
69- Be nice. My family comes from a long line of circus people, fortune tellers, con artists and gypsies, in the Romania, Czech Republic, Turkey and Hungary area. But the real gypsies, not the white trailer trash of New Jersy.
pinkcrayola 0
At least you get the please of suing them!
pinkcrayola 0
**pleasure I'm blaming this one on auto correct
cr3ativity 15
They have no money, cause apparently, they'll be rednecks /hill billy tone/ Obviously.
nikijcchz 10
"Don't throw away good money after bad" it would cost way more to sue them, even if one ends up paying. Ask them for half half or pay it urself!!
MikeDa1Da 14
Have both pay for it. Profit.
Chad_the_Brony 0
My exact thoughts. Make them both pay. If they bitch, tell them you're calling the cops for vandalism and 'trespassing'. I would.
bri5083 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Move. Immediately ,to a Redneck Free environment.
TheCarChanel 0
San fransico
Ferretface 13
Also, to a place where people can spell.
aperfectxdeath 3
I'm a redneck, but I'm fairly sure I can spell. Redneck is just as bad a stereo type as any else. I live in the south as well. We aren't all dumb. ;)
aperfectxdeath 3
I'm a redneck. What if I said move immediately to a bitch free zone?
meade34 2
Well, 54. Then you'd have to follow 20's advice still. And being a red neck isn't bad. Hoosiers are bad.
taybail 0
Just cuz u livez in the south does not mean that you are a red neck
21jason 9
That'd okay back windows are over rated anyways
Furrywhiplash 14
I love looking out my back windows. Plus, they come in handy when my dogs are outside, I can tell when they are doing something they shouldn't be doing.
iFizzgig 11
Like humping the cat
EduJav321 24
Your property = trasspassing = legal murder
angrymexican 8
No, that would be self defense, in which you still can't kill someone.
TomHarrow 5
Pretty sure if it's posted as private property you can shoot. Atleast it is where I come from. Maybe.
Furrywhiplash 14
32- I could be wrong, but I think you need to have a sign up saying something like "private property, trespassers will be shot." But maybe I'm just thinking of the idea of a classic junkyard displayed in movies?
AssassinsCRB 0
You can't legally hurt someone physically from trespassing unless they are harming you physically
smallsmerry123 5
Where I live, if the person is on your property, facing you, and not running away, they are fair game.
silentbutfunny 0
All of this depends on where your from i suppose. My mom (who is a cop) told me there is no such thing as self defence (in minnesota) now if an elderly man gets pushed off his bike and gets mugged by 3 punk teens; and he shoots and kills one of them, of course the police wont charge him. Essentially its the officers/authority's choice in the matter. (true ******* story by the way)
silentbutfunny 0
Now if 2 men are robbing a corner store at gun-point, and the cashier pulls a gun and shoots (not kills) one man in the face and chases the other out of the building, cops wont charge him. If he comes back and pumps 5 or 6 more shots in his belly, that right there is charges up the ass. (another true story, seriously look these up) on your own property its no different. (unless its private, im not sure about private property)
silentbutfunny 0
UNLESS, you told them to leave and they refuse, then i belive you can use force to make them leave. This is all from memory also, my mom is not telling me about this right this second.
silentbutfunny 0
Another case is where an elderly man is sitting in his bed and hears a noise, and he grabs his shotgun. Then a punk kid walks around the corner and gets a shell right to the chest. Cops wont charge him. I personally think that its the cops choice. (funny story, burglerys stoped in the area for a month XD)
eminemop 0
*trespassing
TomHarrow 5
34-That's what I meant by posted as private property.
ferrettamer 6
Where I live, you can kill anybody stupid. But only in your dreams :(
NoSpacesHere 3
Just another day in the trailer park...
aantho_fml 0
I believe it is called a trailer-hood now.
StrangerDangerr 0
Rednecks in the uk? I think not.
chlle_2012 0
Their called chavs...